tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-63242923680204139922024-03-28T14:40:23.405-04:00The United States of BeckyUnknownnoreply@blogger.comBlogger400125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6324292368020413992.post-12268793438353003572023-12-30T23:05:00.003-05:002024-01-16T18:52:09.369-05:002024 Goals<br /><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div>
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<div style="text-align: left;"><u>1.) New Glasses For Shawn:</u></div>
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Pretty basic. He has run his old ones through the ringer; full of stress
fractures and scratches to the point where he basically can't wear them
anymore.
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<div style="text-align: left;"><u>2.) Get 'The' Nose Job:</u></div>
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The actual procedure is called
<a href="https://stanfordhealthcare.org/medical-treatments/n/nasal-surgery/types/turbinate-reduction.html" target="_blank"><span style="color: #741b47;">Radiofrequency Turbinate Ablation</span></a>. A brilliant local ENT will be doing the procedure, which a minimally
invasive office thing.
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<a href="https://www.drugs.com/cg/turbinate-reduction.html" target="_blank"><span style="color: #741b47;">source</span></a><br />
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The goal is to help my asthma and overall breathing, as well improve
use/function of my CPAP machine. Dr. S. was like "That ride one is pretty big.
It's normal to see a bit of a size difference between the two sides, but it's
rare you see a difference this big."
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ME THINKING ABOUT ALL THE "RARE/DIFFERENT INTERESTING" THINGS ON/IN MY BODY:
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<div style="text-align: center;"><iframe allowfullscreen="" class="giphy-embed" frameborder="0" height="280" src="https://giphy.com/embed/Xttxe80QYjEBh3iLVg" width="280"></iframe></div><p><br /></p><div style="text-align: left;"><u>3.) Pay Off Some Medical Bills:</u></div><div style="text-align: left;">I feel like this is self-explanatory.</div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;"><u>4.) Be More Productive on my Social Medias:</u></div><div style="text-align: left;">This is more of the same, it's kind of an every year thing, like clockwork. </div><div style="text-align: left;">Specifically -</div><div style="text-align: left;">❖ I have tried some beauty products and not made a <a href="https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLHuS__PKpdCqg9IOfth2y5YfM4JY3q944" target="_blank"><span style="color: #741b47;">video</span></a> or even a mini <a href="https://unitedstatesofbecky.blogspot.com/search/label/StAB" target="_blank"><span style="color: #741b47;">StAB</span></a> review. </div><div style="text-align: left;">❖ I have watched plenty of movies and either never bothered to review, or started a review and never got around to finishing it. </div><div style="text-align: left;">❖ I have tried some new foods but have not made a single<span style="color: #741b47;"> </span><a href="https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLHuS__PKpdCpvRjTs9KbyAotyPx4txjxm" target="_blank"><span style="color: #741b47;">Let's Eat!</span></a> video demonstrating them.</div><div style="text-align: left;">❖ I also would like to have some more coherence to my <a href="https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLHuS__PKpdCp0z_Lz0xsvo7ExkKWvacSg" target="_blank"><span style="color: #741b47;">State of the Body</span></a> vids. I definitely get to disorganized rambling A LOT and in editing my last video, I was like "Can you say any word other than "Um?" I also feel like I look away from the camera too much. The only reason that video made it through was because I didn't feel like making it again. </div><div style="text-align: left;">So I guess that's going to call for me to maybe make a bullet-point topic cheat sheet so I stay <span style="color: #990000;">somewhat</span> focused. I would also like to post a little more frequently on this subject. Maybe more frequent, but shorter videos. I have a list of topics I'd like to address that aren't just straight updates. Would anyone be interested? (Let's be honest, I'll probably do it regardless.)<br /></div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;">Also, <b>QUESTION:</b></div><div style="text-align: left;">I have considered doing Film Friday reviews by video, but I'm not sure if you would like that. Some of the reason I have considered this is because some of the reviews I abandoned would have come across better in verbal format. The one video Film Friday I did do years ago was just terrible on multiple levels. </div><div style="text-align: left;">I am also going to post this question probably in an actual video. I'd definitely appreciate any feedback.</div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEghXZ_v-Kv9UnkKcc06Ki3qzHbeYWrcOjZPn5kFUPbbnucOyJAQOfyv-uBCWGkVqq2K2YFD-rqw8fdVJTJx0PDKe9N8DEscc4DqoZtSfTqy8DY-pLDJ640xKs-tIqjgjdwHDULAIlbWdfSXLu7M8y9N4nMGrF4MqtrErBDdqREXy66sRa8TTj8LuKiIneU/s520/basicunderlinedivider.png" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="46" data-original-width="520" height="28" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEghXZ_v-Kv9UnkKcc06Ki3qzHbeYWrcOjZPn5kFUPbbnucOyJAQOfyv-uBCWGkVqq2K2YFD-rqw8fdVJTJx0PDKe9N8DEscc4DqoZtSfTqy8DY-pLDJ640xKs-tIqjgjdwHDULAIlbWdfSXLu7M8y9N4nMGrF4MqtrErBDdqREXy66sRa8TTj8LuKiIneU/s320/basicunderlinedivider.png" width="320" /></a></div><u><br /></u><div style="text-align: left;"><u>5.) Speak (Be) Kinder to Myself:</u></div><div style="text-align: left;">I have a habit of being pretty terrible to myself, especially when I'm struggling, which seems to be all the time now.</div><p>I can have a self-deprecating sense of humor. But one day at work, my inner monologue was running it's venomous mouth; I stopped and realized - if I were to witness anyone treating another person the way I talk to myself, I would be horrified. Because in literally any other situation, my own self-talk would be abuse. Not like "That's not nice."</p><p>Literal fucking abuse. </p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhclanZ2zpb-TkKjmcG07JwQpDoj4q5CXJJbuj1Ds4ZdCyQKLseXZoHnZGPhN2HRfh2SaR5BbjyC3k9ZR-l142AijjRZq2DaMvLQ8rO_kySVsCvZU7P43BsXV4hs6SlRGt-Ja_ywCQguQUo_Bv7CgPPICLE4U9IVKHS0c8ScQeKOWYd_dwWGlxbKfinLt0/s717/weddingsinger.png" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="384" data-original-width="717" height="214" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhclanZ2zpb-TkKjmcG07JwQpDoj4q5CXJJbuj1Ds4ZdCyQKLseXZoHnZGPhN2HRfh2SaR5BbjyC3k9ZR-l142AijjRZq2DaMvLQ8rO_kySVsCvZU7P43BsXV4hs6SlRGt-Ja_ywCQguQUo_Bv7CgPPICLE4U9IVKHS0c8ScQeKOWYd_dwWGlxbKfinLt0/w400-h214/weddingsinger.png" width="400" /></a></div><br /><div style="text-align: left;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: left;">Well, those are the big 5. I have more - some smaller, some more complex, some that are dreams and some that are definitely tangible. I find I sometimes want to do a seasonal or other holiday/event relates goals list, so I decided here to focus on The Big 5. </div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;">Also, note I avoided the word "resolution." To me, resolution has a connotation that leans toward perfection and completion. That absolutely does not work for me. Goals, I feel, is more indicative of progress, continuing in working toward something, and when you achieve that, you continue as well as build on it. </div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;">Do you have any goals for 2024? </div><div style="text-align: left;"><br />
</div>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6324292368020413992.post-23704810418082231542023-08-22T22:44:00.001-04:002023-08-22T22:44:29.439-04:00U of M Visit <p>Okay. First I was introduced to the EMG technician, Ross. </p>
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He did the most basic introduction and took my vitals, then it was time for
the neurology fellow, who is my primary on the case, to see me. I will call
her Dr. Fellow, because she is in her Fellowship year. And guys...she <u>LISTENED TO ME</u>.
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She actually carefully read over my timeline of symptoms/events etc., and
asked insightful questions about it. <br />
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She did a full neuro exam from reflexes to finger-touch-nose to a whole bunch
of shit. Reflexes, sensation, flicking my fingers and flexing various body
parts. Much of which I kinda failed. My reflexes were pretty hyper, which I
knew. Evidently I had many problems with temperature, sharp, vibration,
awareness of location in space, all the things. (It could've been so much
worse.)
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<div style="text-align: left;">We spent like, 2 hours on this.</div>
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<div style="text-align: left;">Then it was time for the EMG. </div>
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Ross returns. He is a skilled and friendly lab tech. He does the first part of
the study, which is the nerve conduction/velocity/whatever part.
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<a href="https://www.handtherapyacademy.com/diagnoses/do-you-know-the-difference-between-an-electromyography-emg-and-a-nerve-conduction-velocity-ncv-study/" target="_blank"><span style="color: #741b47;">source</span></a>
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They use the thing that to me, looks like the love child between a
self-defense taser and a barbershop razor.
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This is where it gets interesting. He kept having trouble for some reason.<br />
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After a few minutes, a guy, we'll call him Zach, came in. I quickly learned he
was a neurology resident who happened to want to see an EMG in progress
because he didn't have much experience with them. He kept asking "Is that
normal?" and Ross was like "Um....no." Then Zach kept asking more questions
and the two of them kept attempting different things. After a while, Dr.
Fellow comes back in and she joins the "WTH?" club. Zach leaves for a minute
and then returns. Then, a minute later, another neurology resident appears in the room, announcing, "Hey, I heard there was a really
interesting EMG going on in here."
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<div style="text-align: left;">Me: </div>
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I wasn't upset by this, I am a firm believer in education and if I can offer
something new and interesting to people who are intrigued rather than
dismissive, then great. But it was unnerving. I mean, there are times when you
kind of DON'T want to be interesting. (Although, given how I'd been treated by
many of the doctors up here, I was also relieved top find that no, this was
definitely NOT in my head.)
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So everyone is asking questions/offering suggestions like "press harder",
"check the electrodes", and my favorite, "turn up the voltage."
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Ross decides he needs an expert and leaves to get the head technician. Let's
call her Debbie. Debbie comes in and is very friendly with me but also is very
no-nonsense with the two residents. Debbie is helping Ross figure out the
problem, telling him to press down on the electrodes while she turns up the
voltage and pushes the button.
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At this point it's been a while so - let's call her Dr. Small - the overseeing Clinical
Professor - appears.
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It felt like that scene from <i>Spies Like Us</i>. </div><div style="text-align: left;"> </div>
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And they all kept commenting on how <i>interesting</i> it all was. Ross was
quite thrilled to have such an exciting and unique case to mix up his day and
the residents were delighted to see something so weird and new. After a bit,
Dr. Small allows the first portion of the test to be concluded and sends the
two residents on their way so she can perform the second part of the test,
which is where they stick the needle in the muscle and compare totally relaxed
readings against flexed readings.
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For that test, things went swimmingly. (Not comfortably, but quickly.) Dr.
Small has a sense of humor, because when I ask how things are going, she's
like "Quite normal. In fact...<span style="color: #351c75;">unnervingly</span>
normal."
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<div style="text-align: left;">Me: PUN APPRECIATED.</div>
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Things are a bit more interesting when they do my lower half, but not as crazy
as they were when attempting the first part on my upper half.
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They called Shawn back into the room and Dr. Small started manipulating my
left leg, which is the one with the heavy limp. She asked me:
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<div style="text-align: left;">"Do you have significant lower back pain?"</div>
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Me: "Yes." (Mentally: Duh. What gave it away?")
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So. The reason they had so much fun with the first part of the EMG was because
they couldn't get a measurable response from my nerves, no matter what they
did. Which was why they kept doing different things, checking the machine and
turning up the voltage. Because they would shock my nerves and although the
arm would physically respond with a minor jolt, and I could kinda feel it, the
nerves themselves would not show a response to the stimuli. So. That's fun.
(Note: poor Ross kept telling me how great I did and how easy I was making his
job and he kept apologizing if he was hurting me. And I was like "My dude, the
electric zaps my body sends through my own system are so much worse than what
you're doing right now. No worries.")
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<div style="text-align: left;">
Dr. Small and I had this conversation:
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<div style="text-align: left;">
DS: So, you've never had a limp before this started?
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<div style="text-align: left;">ME: No.</div>
<div style="text-align: left;">
DS: And any time you've ever had back pain before, it's resolved in a couple
days?
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<div style="text-align: left;">ME: Yup.</div>
<div style="text-align: left;">
DS: (Incredulous): So you developed sudden, persistent back pain severe enough to send you to
Urgent Care and a limp at the same time and they didn't do any tests?
</div>
<div style="text-align: left;">ME: Nope. </div>
<div style="text-align: left;">
DS: And this limp hasn't gone away since it developed and neither has the
pain?
</div>
<div style="text-align: left;">ME: Correct.</div>
<div style="text-align: left;">DS: And they developed at the same time?</div>
<div style="text-align: left;">ME: (Nodding) </div>
<div style="text-align: left;">
DS: (Annoyed) And no one thought to put to 2 & 2 together and do more
testing?
</div>
<div style="text-align: left;">ME: Nope.</div>
<div style="text-align: left;">DS: Rolls her eyes.</div><div style="text-align: left;">ME: Agreed. <br /></div>
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<span style="color: #990000;"><br /></span>
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<span style="color: #990000; font-family: verdana; font-size: x-small;">Which is why I am now scheduled for a 3D spinal MRI on the 13th of
September. (It's being done up here, but on the order, it was very explicit
about what she wanted and expected from the imaging.)</span>
</div>
<div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div>
<div style="text-align: left;">
So they (at the time) suspected I had Charcot-Marie Tooth Disease, and
one of the rarest forms of the disease, to boot. (Blood tests would later
conclude that no, in that regard I am normal and do not have CMT.)
</div>
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<div style="text-align: left;">
We also discussed the fact that yes, there are multiple things happening in my
particular problem soup.
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There is 100% an extremely pinched nerve in my lumbar spine, but until they
get the results from the second MRI, they won't know the reason why. Is it
from spinal stenosis? The herniated L5S1? Something else? Don't know yet. But
they compared it to someone grinding their heel down on a hose to stop the
water flow. <i><span style="color: #0b5394;">Nice</span></i>.
</div>
<div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div>
<div style="text-align: left;"> There is also evidence of damage in my cervical spine, but they don't know the
cause yet because stupid people up here didn't send any actual images to U of
M, just the radiologist's report. And if there is one thing I have learned,
it's to not trust what radiologists report. (From my own experiences, not from
other doctors indicating I shouldn't. I can do a post about this later on. For now, please
enjoy this short clip by <span style="color: #741b47;">Dr. Glaucomflecken</span>.)<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div>
<div style="text-align: left;"> </div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<iframe allow="accelerometer; autoplay; clipboard-write; encrypted-media; gyroscope; picture-in-picture; web-share" allowfullscreen="" frameborder="0" height="560" src="https://www.youtube.com/embed/QsqsT3659Ss" title="You Gotta Localize the Lesion" width="320"></iframe> </div><div style="text-align: center;"> </div><div style="text-align: left;"> </div><div style="text-align: left;">And my neurologist seems to feel the same way. Like, great, you gave your report. Now I want to see the images for myself, dillhole. <br /></div><div style="text-align: left;">It is currently suspected that the cause is another severely pinched nerve.
It could also be a few other things. So they also need to see the brain/cervical
spine MRI images before anything can be done.<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: left;">
There is also evidence of upper motor neuron degeneration. </div><div style="text-align: left;">And that is a whole other can of worms. Because how much of it is UMN degeneration and how much is spinal damage? Are the symptoms of one masking symptoms of the other, or exacerbating them? Who knows?<br /></div><div style="text-align: left;"> </div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="background-color: #ffd966;">Current Status: </span></div><div style="text-align: left;">Scheduled for 3D MRI on: September 13. </div><div style="text-align: left;">Next U of M appointment: October 12.</div><div style="text-align: left;"> </div><div style="text-align: left;"><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgFI58o3DoIBP1J8ZPFUVVS_MRHrGzVN7dziBkLiya6cSLBRHTtkxHc-B6dhyKhwCvYblD_gZgP3GLA7322jT7Mjtpe-Guz6jBohe-k8zHQRQFFLokb3nhEGU0ejYPyPKYZz64NQSAh9fQsoO5UpahWUJxtAKUJulpPKVRoSQtgu6cGqNWdiJLBgl4zYlc/s2000/neuronscolored.png" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="244" data-original-width="2000" height="78" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgFI58o3DoIBP1J8ZPFUVVS_MRHrGzVN7dziBkLiya6cSLBRHTtkxHc-B6dhyKhwCvYblD_gZgP3GLA7322jT7Mjtpe-Guz6jBohe-k8zHQRQFFLokb3nhEGU0ejYPyPKYZz64NQSAh9fQsoO5UpahWUJxtAKUJulpPKVRoSQtgu6cGqNWdiJLBgl4zYlc/w640-h78/neuronscolored.png" width="640" /></a></div></div><div style="text-align: left;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: left;">I am on an anticonvulsant which has helped calm the over-excitement of nerves. With it, my electric zaps have reduced significantly (I still get bad ones in my hands), my skin doesn't feel like it's on fire all the time, and of course, the seizures I've been suffering have also significantly reduced. (Still have occasional convulsions, but not nearly as many and not nearly as bad.) </div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;">Leaving U of M, driving home, I told Shawn how, for the first time since I can remember, I have felt a sense of hope, of optimism. I genuinely don't know what's-the-what, but I have suspicions. However, assuming my limp is a hardware issue and not a software one - that would be amazing. The possibility that I could walk normally again. Honestly, it was something I had let go of and that hope is back. I might be able to walk normal again. And depending on what's going on in my cervical spine - well, I might be able to one day regain control of my hands. I may again someday be able to put a necklace on without help. These things are in the future and will require a lot of treatment - but the likelihood is there. I could walk normally again someday! And that is something to look forward to. </div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /><div style="text-align: center;"><iframe allowfullscreen="" class="giphy-embed" frameborder="0" height="269" src="https://giphy.com/embed/hERwuxEKbeDKqBS3iy" width="480"></iframe></div><p><br /></p>
</div>
<div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div>
<div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div>
<div style="text-align: left;"> </div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="font-size: x-small;"><span style="color: #741b47; font-family: verdana;"> </span></span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="font-size: x-small;"><span style="color: #741b47; font-family: verdana;"> </span></span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="font-size: x-small;"><span style="color: #741b47; font-family: verdana;">Dr. Glaucomflecken <<<</span><span style="font-family: verdana;">do yourself a favor and check this guy out. He's on youtube & tiktok</span></span> <br /></div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="font-family: verdana; font-size: x-small;"><a href="https://pixabay.com/users/nickyhayes-3630151/" target="_blank"><span style="color: #741b47;">Original Nerve Image</span></a></span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div>
<div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div>
Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6324292368020413992.post-77359360419854922092023-08-06T18:12:00.004-04:002023-08-06T18:12:58.508-04:00𝆕"Life Can Be Unkind"𝆕<div style="text-align: center;">
<iframe allow="accelerometer; autoplay; clipboard-write; encrypted-media; gyroscope; picture-in-picture; web-share" allowfullscreen="" frameborder="0" height="100" src="https://www.youtube.com/embed/JFwKt4WuW-Q" title="YouTube video player" width="450"></iframe>
</div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: helvetica;"> </span>
</div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-size: small;">Ok, so I tried to share a widget and a button and all the things but
apparently Firefox is like fuck that noise so maybe I need to switch to
Chrome? At any rate, I got around it by doing a copy/paste/add a link thing,
which is why this appears so wonky. </span>
</div>
<span style="font-size: small;"> <br /></span>
<div>
<span style="font-family: helvetica;"><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhl8WBkPi-rsEiSEJyRKhQRJ5wbDxinvCsk5hNEsZJqI6LeT_f7x2rFcw4ie_M3KLRU7CpgzPQW68T1OLW1aVuaxUDcmuiOK6yOIsfN4D_79s8SNYMTwLgiBu_U3tBKiQTdlDxbwEj2fWJTyzn79ARd_NfSjs1S666zC2mMK6LQNPdWVVa-ocl3QGhYmwY/s2000/collage1.png" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="2000" data-original-width="2000" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhl8WBkPi-rsEiSEJyRKhQRJ5wbDxinvCsk5hNEsZJqI6LeT_f7x2rFcw4ie_M3KLRU7CpgzPQW68T1OLW1aVuaxUDcmuiOK6yOIsfN4D_79s8SNYMTwLgiBu_U3tBKiQTdlDxbwEj2fWJTyzn79ARd_NfSjs1S666zC2mMK6LQNPdWVVa-ocl3QGhYmwY/w400-h400/collage1.png" width="400" /></a></div></span><br />
</div>
<br />
<div>
Hi! Thanks for taking the time to read this. My name is Becky, and my body
& mind seem to be degenerating before my very eyes. It started as numbness
and weakness in my hands, making it difficult to type. It progressed to the
point where I cannot put earrings in for lack of sensation & dexterity.
Sometimes things just randomly fall out of my hands. I have developed a
severe, unrelenting limp that put me in the hospital and led to a toe
amputation and multiple foot operations.
</div>
<div>
I've been struggling with so many things I cannot list them here, but suffice
to say, these days, it is a constant struggle to control my body. Medications
help, but they are expensive, even with insurance.
</div>
<div>
I am being treated by experts in the field of Degenerative Neurological
disorders at University of Michigan Hospital.
</div>
<div>
Thus far, we don't know the underlying cause. We do know it is a progressive
issue that has to be watched over time to measure strength, nerve response,
degeneration, and a whole host of technical medical things to get to the
bottom of it. We do know there is trauma to both my lumbar and cervical spine,
which we hope to treat with a multi-prong assault in order to improve my
quality of life.
</div>
<div>
But multiple specialists, legions of tests, long drives and numerous
medications are expensive; and have left my husband and me in heavy debt with
more on the horizon.
</div>
<div>
My husband and I both work full time; he is in maintenance and I am a pharmacy
technician. We have applied for assistance across the board, but do not
qualify. To be perfectly honest, we even examined the option of my leaving
work so I could heal and we might qualify for some kind of support from
somewhere. Ultimately, my husband makes just a little too much for us to be
eligible, even if I'm not working. And truth be told, I love my job, and I am
the insurance carrier in our house. Without my insurance, we wouldn't be
getting ANY treatment and I would just rapidly degenerate without
intervention.
</div>
<div>
If you can donate, we would both deeply appreciate it. The money would go to
paying our multitude of medical costs, which may soon include spinal surgery,
depending on the tests. (Fingers crossed it doesn't come to that.) Medical
intervention by the experts at U of M is the only reason I am still able to
work to pay for things like rent, food, etc. In fact, without my medication, I
can barely function, let alone work.
</div>
<div>
We are trying hard to keep pushing forward and looking to the future with
hopeful hearts, but we desperately need help.
</div><p>
Every tiny bit matters. Whether you are able to help or not, we ask you to share
this fundraiser so others might see it. Thank you. </p><p> </p><p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgMLl8k03ZiDlovR-a3yV7zsmsCVKlP42U6hBciRmoc9KnGnwhRAYcS_fDqRw8KSzXD_CKXx-aEQ96dZb1NyL0UFuHGJmRDb0XVbmkVSr7LcUzGbpqP7tTok6SCzYdVgGXwP3e65ECHdQM1-x0kV4oQMFZoJiT_XOqwjPJ4BCGz0rLMbQyBk_rRex-jxTo/s800/branch%20divider.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="200" data-original-width="800" height="80" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgMLl8k03ZiDlovR-a3yV7zsmsCVKlP42U6hBciRmoc9KnGnwhRAYcS_fDqRw8KSzXD_CKXx-aEQ96dZb1NyL0UFuHGJmRDb0XVbmkVSr7LcUzGbpqP7tTok6SCzYdVgGXwP3e65ECHdQM1-x0kV4oQMFZoJiT_XOqwjPJ4BCGz0rLMbQyBk_rRex-jxTo/s320/branch%20divider.png" width="320" /></a></div><p style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: #741b47; font-size: x-large;"> </span><span style="font-size: x-large;"><a href="https://gofund.me/9f8f8415"><span style="color: #741b47;"><span style="font-family: Caveat Brush;">Go Fund Me</span></span></a><span style="color: #741b47;"><span style="font-family: Caveat Brush;"> <br /></span></span></span>
</p>
<p style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: #741b47;"><span style="font-family: Caveat Brush; font-size: x-large;"></span></span></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="color: #741b47;"><span style="font-family: Caveat Brush; font-size: x-large;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj9u9nYVluOx9K2fyR4CGX3keT7YvlQ-5wA7yWxjHmVrGrDHhyswTAGEn4DCLcg_11MQRCgoHmMXf1cDQWeQkUMzPDPq7ZAm1nXlM1Rpgvcod2_LOKMfoDnRXAJtNbH46apQQkyAp4XNPaVqYB-CIVK6cdmWy_oY4l_tQCxmUvKBMdfA5dhuW7YoKnoU1k/s800/branch%20divider.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="200" data-original-width="800" height="80" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj9u9nYVluOx9K2fyR4CGX3keT7YvlQ-5wA7yWxjHmVrGrDHhyswTAGEn4DCLcg_11MQRCgoHmMXf1cDQWeQkUMzPDPq7ZAm1nXlM1Rpgvcod2_LOKMfoDnRXAJtNbH46apQQkyAp4XNPaVqYB-CIVK6cdmWy_oY4l_tQCxmUvKBMdfA5dhuW7YoKnoU1k/w320-h80/branch%20divider.png" width="320" /></a></span></span></div><span style="color: #741b47;"><span style="font-family: Caveat Brush; font-size: x-large;"><br /></span></span>
<p></p>
<p style="text-align: center;">
<span style="color: #741b47;"><span style="font-family: Caveat Brush; font-size: x-large;"></span></span>
</p>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<span style="color: #741b47;"><span style="font-family: Caveat Brush; font-size: x-large;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiqBj75rLyH_PcU7nYN2flLyLHEJaOXBpzjvoYV-0h-k5Ar7G1BAstDoq1Dbpwx0f-h1_k0-BvAkPhFf3v02eCJM1Z86M_513vbUgza5_v2KdL0WXmt4-csl8Qo6vFPq7BaW6PDDRzPW7rd1xjsj4Kr6tWANo1QibSGyqmtGZUo1Z5OuHrvovLX_dQ8GVA/s1233/fastball%20quote.png" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1016" data-original-width="1233" height="330" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiqBj75rLyH_PcU7nYN2flLyLHEJaOXBpzjvoYV-0h-k5Ar7G1BAstDoq1Dbpwx0f-h1_k0-BvAkPhFf3v02eCJM1Z86M_513vbUgza5_v2KdL0WXmt4-csl8Qo6vFPq7BaW6PDDRzPW7rd1xjsj4Kr6tWANo1QibSGyqmtGZUo1Z5OuHrvovLX_dQ8GVA/w400-h330/fastball%20quote.png" width="400" /></a></span></span>
</div>
<span style="color: #741b47;"><span style="font-family: Caveat Brush; font-size: x-large;"><br /></span></span>
<p></p>
Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6324292368020413992.post-47141063325063172682023-07-23T22:12:00.002-04:002023-07-23T22:12:26.661-04:00Sunday Confessions: July 23, 2023<p> </p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhmrXUM3JMjfRqME39dlHmh0zbq0bfNNGMFWAGPuHBsfOtoos5J0HRgpbAYE2fRtpW5WM2CVoC3C5kj7P-we1haIgijPAE_tkBaPxqsT1ns0J-XfUyaRW0Ho0P5QqMKlzC_qI2DXjMrd5F2Xf52sf-BwhBvt8oPo5AK7kMyS5JiLJfQrcueIXU0hS4rBC0/s2620/SC6920.jpg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="2620" data-original-width="2620" height="362" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhmrXUM3JMjfRqME39dlHmh0zbq0bfNNGMFWAGPuHBsfOtoos5J0HRgpbAYE2fRtpW5WM2CVoC3C5kj7P-we1haIgijPAE_tkBaPxqsT1ns0J-XfUyaRW0Ho0P5QqMKlzC_qI2DXjMrd5F2Xf52sf-BwhBvt8oPo5AK7kMyS5JiLJfQrcueIXU0hS4rBC0/w362-h362/SC6920.jpg" width="362" /></a></div><br /><p></p><p><br /></p><div style="text-align: left;"><b>I Confess:</b></div><div style="text-align: left;">The trip to U of M went really well. But I have to do an entire post about it (which will likely be long), in order to properly discuss everything. That is in the works. But the main thing is we have started working toward SOMETHING. People (cough: doctors) LISTENED. I normally am pretty patient and understanding with the medical profession. I am very aware of how overworked, understaffed, and abused they are (both physically & mentally). But in the past few years, I have become intimately acquainted with the side that makes people say "If I was having a stroke, I'd rather die than have that doctor treat me." (-Me)<br /></div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;"><b>I Confess:</b></div><div style="text-align: left;">When my PCP sort of implied - READ: ["I'm not saying it is, but have you considered this could be <a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjYNMZ3j4glDB6gyPVtjiFIrckvnnltDnH1U9Bsk2R8Am598okBipAGfm6kEiFWyOrotCP6AENBhRsgB5BPnCAX8WAId5AhjTUff2r-Knb6Vy9brRRF0x-L_xDmi0DwLUQ06lwmsVVaSyB5eK7poGoBvvPzFnN_1oRhANaFkRgayemvPpR0htY5ECyIvlA/w640-h262/cd2.PNG" target="_blank"><span style="color: #741b47;">Conversion</span> <span style="color: #741b47;">Disorder</span></a>?"] <<< direct quote>>> <br /></div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: center;"><iframe allowfullscreen="" class="giphy-embed" frameborder="0" height="270" src="https://giphy.com/embed/l41lQNLtAit18YIPS" width="480"></iframe></div><p><br /></p><p>I
sort of lost my shit. I had been teetering on the edge for quite a
while but this ending up being the last cherry on the sundae. Which is
how I ended up the behavioral health specialist's office, sobbing on her
couch for an hour, which is what ended up with contacting my
psychiatrist, which led to the psychiatric leave. I return August 1, and
I am looking forward to it. <br /></p><div style="text-align: left;"><br /><br /></div><p></p><p><br />
</p><p><br />
</p><p><br />
</p><p><span style="font-family: verdana;"><br /></span>
</p><p><span style="font-family: verdana;"><br /></span>
</p><p><span style="font-family: verdana;"><br /></span>
</p><p><span style="font-family: verdana;"><br /></span>
</p><p><span style="font-size: x-small;"><span style="font-family: verdana;"><a href="https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/conditions/conversion-disorder" target="_blank"><span style="color: #741b47;">Conversion Disorder Image Source</span></a></span></span><br />
</p>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6324292368020413992.post-11316344556439368572023-07-16T18:04:00.001-04:002023-07-16T18:04:39.227-04:00Sunday Confessions: July 16, 2023<p style="text-align: center;"> </p>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgWSCQ9yXcMeBAArfR6Z8nibOIqA75_8mq2rQmpFH1QYlqEqhcm9BZte4hsxKdu1Mnx_TBT39HueaV_KM9S_HKxgiJnqyxGLdqCdVPePvTtZ35VK0M5XK26ddN629w2x19zdNNiYxGBWu-T6D8Lc8gafkk8r8Qdkyrh2SVivld3tk0xLyXNqoiPUrH8gGg/s6000/sundayconfessionssummer2022(1).jpg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="4000" data-original-width="6000" height="384" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgWSCQ9yXcMeBAArfR6Z8nibOIqA75_8mq2rQmpFH1QYlqEqhcm9BZte4hsxKdu1Mnx_TBT39HueaV_KM9S_HKxgiJnqyxGLdqCdVPePvTtZ35VK0M5XK26ddN629w2x19zdNNiYxGBWu-T6D8Lc8gafkk8r8Qdkyrh2SVivld3tk0xLyXNqoiPUrH8gGg/w577-h384/sundayconfessionssummer2022(1).jpg" width="577" /></a>
</div>
<p></p>
<p style="text-align: center;"><br /></p>
<div style="text-align: left;"><b>I Confess:</b></div>
<div style="text-align: left;">
We're in the final countdown. My first neurology appointment is coming soon.
(Specifically, Thursday the 20th.) I am looking forward to it and am also
terrified.
</div>
<div style="text-align: left;">Terrified of so many things. </div>
<div style="text-align: left;"> </div>
<div style="text-align: left;">
I know I won't be getting a diagnosis this week.
</div>
<div style="text-align: left;">
<div style="text-align: left;">
But I'm anxious about....what lies beneath.
</div>
<div style="text-align: center;"> </div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<iframe allowfullscreen="" class="giphy-embed" frameborder="0" height="350" src="https://giphy.com/embed/WNsGxjLIKds4ZO0kHc" width="350"></iframe>
</div>
<p><br /></p>
</div>
<div style="text-align: left;">
When I
<a href="https://unitedstatesofbecky.blogspot.com/2023/03/something-i-have-been-holding-back.html" target="_blank"><span style="color: #741b47;">first shared</span></a>
on this blog about having some sort of neurological problem, it was March 22.
I had already been referred to University of Michigan Neurology by then, but
the appointment hadn't been scheduled. Obviously I was already having issues
problematic enough for the referral.
</div>
<div style="text-align: left;">The thing I haven't shared: </div>
<div style="text-align: left;">
I've been steadily declining since then.
</div>
<div style="text-align: left;">
It's a long story I hope to tell someday. On youtube, maybe. I'd like to write
it as well.<br />
</div>
<div style="text-align: left;">
I have been struggling just to survive - on several fronts. </div><div style="text-align: left;"> </div><div style="text-align: left;">There is so much I want to say and I feel so incapable of saying it right now. </div><div style="text-align: left;">I have a lot of anger at the medical profession right now. Well, I'm angry at my PCP, who recently decided to join the "<span style="color: #990000;">I can't figure it out so have you considered you're making it up?"</span> school of medicine. Also, I have cried out for help, for pain management, for someone to do something, and I have been met with sympathetic "that must be frustrating" emails. </div><div style="text-align: left;">In one email, when I expressed my feelings of helplessness and frustration, at the end, I made the joke that if I end up having a tumor I'm going to be pissed. Her response was that my last MRI (in September) didn't show a tumor, so that should be a source of comfort. </div><div style="text-align: left;"> </div><div style="text-align: left;">I was not comforted.</div><div style="text-align: left;"> </div>
<div style="text-align: left;"> </div><div style="text-align: center;"><iframe allowfullscreen="" class="giphy-embed" frameborder="0" height="264" src="https://giphy.com/embed/srG5YjCn51OIE" width="480"></iframe></div><p><br /></p><p>The truth is, I am floating the idea of trying to find a new PCP. I don't know. I just don't know. </p><p>I can't even begin to express the rage I have at the ER staff I have interacted with on the multiple occasions Urgent Care or my PCP sent me over the past few months. </p><p><br /></p><div style="text-align: left;">I'm worried the doctors at U of M will be condescending and dismissive as they have been up here. I'm worried I'm losing my mind. I'm worried about what I might have, although some options are scarier than others. I'm worried about how long it's going to take to find out just what is going on. </div><div style="text-align: left;">It's just. Sleep is hard. Nightmares abound. I'm not in a good way, generally speaking. I just want it to get here already. <br /></div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div>
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Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6324292368020413992.post-71302519726460169862023-05-20T04:51:00.001-04:002023-05-20T04:51:00.144-04:00Project Selfie<div style="text-align: left;"> </div><div style="text-align: left;">I absolutely stole this from <a href="http://faerieye.blogspot.com/" target="_blank"><span style="color: #741b47;">Heather</span></a>. </div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;">I'm aging.</div><div style="text-align: left;">I will be posting this shortly before my 43rd birthday. </div><div style="text-align: left;">Some days are not bad. Some days are good. Some are terrible. </div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;">There are plenty of things I wish could <strike>improve</strike> change about myself. (Full disclosure: I absolutely had this written as "improve" the entire time it's been sitting in drafts, it's only upon editing that I decided on the current strike-through.) </div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;">I actually started making a list of the <strike>improvements</strike> changes I would make and I was like, damn - would I even look like myself? </div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;">Aging has hit my hair the hardest, I think. I started getting greys in my mid-thirties. I noticed my hair thinning in my late twenties/early thirties. The graying hair is most noticeable around my ears. I use semi-permanent dye that is fairly close to my "natural" color and just fades with washes so it looks slightly more natural and also isn't as harsh. Recently, on a whim, I decided to do purple. I have another box of purple sitting on my bathroom counter, but I'm waiting to use it until right before I return to work. </div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;">So I generally hate selfies. Not other people's. Just mine,. But I've been trying to take one every day (unfortunately I frequently forget, so this isn't a true selfie-a-day.)</div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;">The only rules I have are:</div><div style="text-align: left;">❖ No retouching the photos to smooth out blemishes or make my chin look slimmer, my eyes brighter, anything of the like.</div><div style="text-align: left;">❖ No fixing my hair beforehand. So whatever hair is happening is what's happening. </div><div style="text-align: left;">❖ I am trying to allow my mood to reflect in the photos. At least to a point. If I'm feeling silly, dorky, sad, tired, playful. The one on the top left, the very first one, looks like I'm kinda pissed, but that's just my face. I have hardcore RBF. <br /></div><p style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhtp7KxHmcqnxMcrEZzCywUCCeMSCMxvDfUQ8_zGEb9hk1dGfZ-ON2ovAuDDzV3_1JxKgBktkzsfWMwT74RabkQaV7qC5vKoG2ODnwY78_XJ08qtSRff16G-numw58u9uQVAJK6yFAXQqggqUDyPWZb0HIkyhyZOBhidmD-2Kdo68Uwz1Bl3zNKMVbb/s1012/collage1.jpg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1012" data-original-width="669" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhtp7KxHmcqnxMcrEZzCywUCCeMSCMxvDfUQ8_zGEb9hk1dGfZ-ON2ovAuDDzV3_1JxKgBktkzsfWMwT74RabkQaV7qC5vKoG2ODnwY78_XJ08qtSRff16G-numw58u9uQVAJK6yFAXQqggqUDyPWZb0HIkyhyZOBhidmD-2Kdo68Uwz1Bl3zNKMVbb/s16000/collage1.jpg" /></a></p><p style="text-align: center;"></p><p style="text-align: center;"> </p><p style="text-align: center;"> </p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj1qNVCi3hKu6V0pe7iL8qjH2_mi5rqZ_S3i12-CBAjoxFuDWbTbb-CEEazR-x2yOrtQ6mKd6WxeKhVBRueqesxnf1ziycG1V7CCuOltqhByd5WKHbCEZwNdO4nBBidQs9VJe_7h9rdeM87-TNSsmZceFCWwnRekDgEG8fBKVl4zsUXcW89r4Q_2r4L/s1012/collage3.jpg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1012" data-original-width="669" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj1qNVCi3hKu6V0pe7iL8qjH2_mi5rqZ_S3i12-CBAjoxFuDWbTbb-CEEazR-x2yOrtQ6mKd6WxeKhVBRueqesxnf1ziycG1V7CCuOltqhByd5WKHbCEZwNdO4nBBidQs9VJe_7h9rdeM87-TNSsmZceFCWwnRekDgEG8fBKVl4zsUXcW89r4Q_2r4L/s16000/collage3.jpg" /> </a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"> </div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"> </div><br /><p></p><p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiJpfYvtVxcXU81_MVoqWt9paBHQp--lxx7Pnnwz8GERsmg8AOa6IWQIq64ZEctsa-OyqDm-ntQyOQffyDQSPFuOrxMKEiTy8tZ7DsQSc-Vm0e36VhTCuN05h3loRSvAB4ZLGeFS8nyRN-bedi4k0J_gQHqF0NjG95Nzsz79Ph25a4CZWL0sqHsrbxI/s1012/collage4.jpg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1012" data-original-width="669" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiJpfYvtVxcXU81_MVoqWt9paBHQp--lxx7Pnnwz8GERsmg8AOa6IWQIq64ZEctsa-OyqDm-ntQyOQffyDQSPFuOrxMKEiTy8tZ7DsQSc-Vm0e36VhTCuN05h3loRSvAB4ZLGeFS8nyRN-bedi4k0J_gQHqF0NjG95Nzsz79Ph25a4CZWL0sqHsrbxI/s16000/collage4.jpg" /></a></div><br /><br /><p></p>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6324292368020413992.post-39040853651266252702023-05-15T16:09:00.002-04:002023-05-15T16:09:44.139-04:00Sunday Confessions: May 14, 2023<div style="text-align: center;"> <div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhkB_RRkcZFvwpJrO4PUkpfwWBrJrFdZX3ub2eEJCLJoasdnjBNBkTlkHvEmI77P9mSnjULOn0BiP5eRBbG5cm8JOsmQciFoqYeSjRVmErcqYpwo7E-FJ5nsCe29zRhjEs7CGx9YuRkSwrgpqQp-Jq2onYej9qCrbcPoB223o25btuqbXbIgRKIextW/s2620/SC6920.jpg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="2620" data-original-width="2620" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhkB_RRkcZFvwpJrO4PUkpfwWBrJrFdZX3ub2eEJCLJoasdnjBNBkTlkHvEmI77P9mSnjULOn0BiP5eRBbG5cm8JOsmQciFoqYeSjRVmErcqYpwo7E-FJ5nsCe29zRhjEs7CGx9YuRkSwrgpqQp-Jq2onYej9qCrbcPoB223o25btuqbXbIgRKIextW/w400-h400/SC6920.jpg" width="400" /></a></div></div><div style="text-align: center;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;"><u>I Confess:</u></div><div style="text-align: left;">The other week when I was in hospital for a few days, I hadn't had a BM (because I never do in hospital), and they were prepping me to go home Tuesday the 25th. But. As you may know, they won't let you go unless you meet certain criteria. One of them being having a successful poo. </div><div style="text-align: left;">So I absolutely lied and told the night nurse/am nurse that I HAD had a BM. (I also do not recommend this and feel I should probably make it clear that lying to medical staff is a big no-no, etc.) But. Within 2 hours of being home, I was getting it done. </div><div style="text-align: left;"> </div><div style="text-align: left;"> </div><div style="text-align: center;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: center;"><iframe allowfullscreen="" class="giphy-embed" frameborder="0" height="250" src="https://giphy.com/embed/3o6ZsZ46fA3oo2hJG8" width="400"></iframe></div><p><br /></p><p><br /></p><div style="text-align: left;"><u>I Confess:</u></div><div style="text-align: left;">I started reading a book, "<a href="https://www.goodreads.com/en/book/show/61239463" target="_blank"><span style="color: #741b47;">Your Driver is Waiting</span></a>," by Priya Guns, and I like it, per se, but had to abandon it as I am definitely not in the right frame of mind to read it. </div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;"><u>I Confess:</u></div><div style="text-align: left;">I splurged on a <a href="https://www.google.com/search?client=firefox-b-1-d&q=fur+zapper" target="_blank"><span style="color: #741b47;">Fur Zapper</span></a> (got mine at Target - store pick-up) as a special treat to help combat the never-ending cat hair. And it works! I have only washed blankets & monkeys so far, but after every load, the things are full of hairs, and they come out with less hair on them. Definitely worth the price.</div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;">Oh my god...</div><div style="text-align: left;"><u><br /></u></div><div style="text-align: left;"><u>I Confess:</u> </div><div style="text-align: left;">I had this post all ready to go and forgot to post it on actual Sunday. So here it is now, on Monday.</div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: center;"><iframe allowfullscreen="" class="giphy-embed" frameborder="0" height="275" src="https://giphy.com/embed/l0G18G3m69vQCOddm" width="400"></iframe></div><p><br /></p>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6324292368020413992.post-86767893245964713382023-05-05T02:14:00.001-04:002023-05-05T02:14:00.145-04:00Film Friday: Renfield<p style="text-align: center;"> </p><table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><tbody><tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg3UFWs8YsJIwhqgXPcopNyEiZ_B0WOFnKBhF9ng_2gY5YoOyPm5YlwG9-ISFcEFz34d6NpT0nigN0DGXvX5A-hoOogr7QxJ03_AIGwOPcj6JHNzCtnE_odqYwczkJj9HJop_LwydvlN_FGwVXBPEH5tMdGb2CTpux8xdR7QC89DMgjS9AiUB-Kk8uR/s887/rnf-teaser1sheet-rgb-4-63b6e33d6747b-1.jpg" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" data-original-height="887" data-original-width="560" height="457" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg3UFWs8YsJIwhqgXPcopNyEiZ_B0WOFnKBhF9ng_2gY5YoOyPm5YlwG9-ISFcEFz34d6NpT0nigN0DGXvX5A-hoOogr7QxJ03_AIGwOPcj6JHNzCtnE_odqYwczkJj9HJop_LwydvlN_FGwVXBPEH5tMdGb2CTpux8xdR7QC89DMgjS9AiUB-Kk8uR/w289-h457/rnf-teaser1sheet-rgb-4-63b6e33d6747b-1.jpg" width="289" /></a></td></tr><tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://www.universalpictures.com/movies/renfield" style="color: #741b47;" target="_blank">source</a></td></tr></tbody></table><p></p><p style="text-align: left;"><br /></p><div style="text-align: left;">You've seen the trailer. But it's tradition.</div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: center;"><iframe allow="accelerometer; autoplay; clipboard-write; encrypted-media; gyroscope; picture-in-picture; web-share" allowfullscreen="" frameborder="0" height="315" src="https://www.youtube.com/embed/6LmO6rmDW08" title="YouTube video player" width="560"></iframe><br /></div><p></p><p><br />
</p><div style="text-align: left;">Guys, I had so much fun with this movie.</div><div style="text-align: left;">Remember last week, when I reviewed Scream 6, and I mentioned that sometimes perception of a film can be unfairly influenced by the theater-going experience? </div><div style="text-align: left;">For me, <i>Renfield</i> is the opposite of that - in that the movie stood out and I had a blast with it in spite of my sister being pouty and dour, my brother being all muted and grumpy, and barely getting to say hi to my nephew since he was running late.</div><div style="text-align: left;"> </div><div style="text-align: left;">Now, let's address the biggest elephant first: </div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: center;"><img alt="Hello There Dracula GIF - Hello there Dracula Nicolas cage - Discover & Share GIFs" aria-hidden="false" class="r48jcc pT0Scc iPVvYb" height="304" src="https://media.tenor.com/UIxzEMBBkJ0AAAAd/hello-there-dracula.gif" style="height: 377px; margin: 0px; max-width: 498px; width: 377px;" width="304" /></div><div style="text-align: left;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: left;"> </div><div style="text-align: left;">Nicolas Cage fandom is quite a sliding scale, from detestation to adoration. I fall generally in the middle of that scale. I enjoy Nic Cage, I find him compelling & talented & immensely watchable. I don't watch everything he's in just because he's in it, but generally I think his particular brand of insanity lends a certain something-something to his roles. </div><div style="text-align: left;">If you haven't seen the brilliant, hilarious, ridiculous, and bizarre cult classic <i>Vampire's Kiss</i>, I highly recommend it. </div><div style="text-align: left;"><br />
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</div><div style="text-align: left;"> </div><div style="text-align: left;">It makes his performance as Ghost Rider (another movie where his brand of crazy makes the film better), appear positively sane.</div><div style="text-align: left;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: left;">So. All this to say that if you are all about that Cage, you'll probably enjoy this movie and wish he was in more of it. If you actively dislike the Cage, you're probably not going to like it as much. </div><div style="text-align: center;"> <br /></div><div style="text-align: left;"> </div><div style="text-align: left;">That being said, Nicholas Hoult is just absolutely fucking delightful. (I do have a thing for those British boys.) </div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: center;"><img alt="Oh Hi Renfield GIF - Oh hi Renfield Nicholas hoult - Discover & Share GIFs" aria-hidden="false" class="r48jcc pT0Scc iPVvYb" src="https://media.tenor.com/9U3lnVzw3fYAAAAC/oh-hi-renfield.gif" style="height: 281px; margin: 0px; max-width: 498px; width: 498px;" /></div><div style="text-align: left;"> <br /></div><div style="text-align: left;"><br />
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</div><div style="text-align: left;">So, Renfield is a dark-comedy-action-horror flick where Hoult plays R.M. Renfield, a supporting character from the novel, one who helps complete the circle of how all the characters intertwine. Hoult <span style="color: #990000;">kills it</span>, so to speak. Heh heh,<br /></div><div style="text-align: left;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: left;">The movie doesn't drag - right from the opening we have action, humor, and quick pacing. </div><div style="text-align: left;">I honestly thought the self-help/group therapy angle was pretty funny. </div><div style="text-align: left;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: left;">It has been said that some of the movie's pacing and scene-jumping made it feel as though some things were chopped and left on the cutting room floor. </div><div style="text-align: left;">What can I say? Probably so. That's how movies are made. I would love to see any deleted scenes, but for me it didn't hinder the movie too much. I still found it excellent fun, a quickly-paced popcorn film that honestly, I find more realistic than say, the Fast & Furious franchise. </div><div style="text-align: left;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: left;">The final two minutes were my least favorite of the movie. I don't HATE them, exactly. I just feel like it could've been done better. The way the movie closes leaves it so it can be a fun one-off or, more likely, open for a sequel. So I kind of get why they did what they did with the end, but it still could've been better for the final two minutes. </div><div style="text-align: left;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: left;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh2ndzEWhLKER6wCf7kxAaUMYkQzBvlZuCe0xIGWuoFtv3uJ_sa9zi4CND-7IycPy_U2FBxM2DtBK9ZGQKiPAb_N0gpz-JKCbbBseuOElaOzn3ING3OyXGusqcNAyGVIuSq9an3NqLuH2F7ixDmfT3SZqGssgiCKaj409qfHRLx8anizB1wuUHPyMGN/s250/Untitled.png" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="250" data-original-width="250" height="128" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh2ndzEWhLKER6wCf7kxAaUMYkQzBvlZuCe0xIGWuoFtv3uJ_sa9zi4CND-7IycPy_U2FBxM2DtBK9ZGQKiPAb_N0gpz-JKCbbBseuOElaOzn3ING3OyXGusqcNAyGVIuSq9an3NqLuH2F7ixDmfT3SZqGssgiCKaj409qfHRLx8anizB1wuUHPyMGN/w128-h128/Untitled.png" width="128" /></a>
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</div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="background-color: #f1c232;">Heads Up:</span> Gore, violence, (lol so much violence), language, adult themes?</div><div style="text-align: left;"><br />
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</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjgtfK0nBPu-ZO5FMNKZgJ_m3ShhH9zElhB7mCNZIdq8fXjivvLK6PTk52cWFMG2V3fj3fhHtrxKp32SCcgS0VePxNDwoOzjg16Wpp97JYuEP2ySQoNzRlX9T2Fym9NzDU8s2YrOFyGB4LaqleKsnRvQA4k00YKs1UXCqRnF2SIcLLPsGALPN63eE3V/s640/filmfridaywithusob.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="360" data-original-width="640" height="225" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjgtfK0nBPu-ZO5FMNKZgJ_m3ShhH9zElhB7mCNZIdq8fXjivvLK6PTk52cWFMG2V3fj3fhHtrxKp32SCcgS0VePxNDwoOzjg16Wpp97JYuEP2ySQoNzRlX9T2Fym9NzDU8s2YrOFyGB4LaqleKsnRvQA4k00YKs1UXCqRnF2SIcLLPsGALPN63eE3V/w400-h225/filmfridaywithusob.png" width="400" /></a></div><br /><div style="text-align: left;"><br />
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</div>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6324292368020413992.post-44752260692819086952023-04-28T02:25:00.002-04:002023-05-03T16:31:00.380-04:00Film Friday: Scream VI<div style="text-align: center;"><br /></div><table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><tbody><tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEip6gPKjejdEtFXYUuKOLq6iHU_ftba-IbrdWfROZ-558HgHLkeb5USroduQCQ7o2Libb5-HL0C8Xo0xQrQZdx8b8Tr68QavpAurzG8Lx3PlqsBl4wBGGOCwi6v3jY0gtuQS75cwUV9Ecs3m1E_eZFuPTpFXPyR52cXYc6bjUf1VYhg_aEzMC_nPpFG/s3000/scream6.jpg" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" data-original-height="3000" data-original-width="1922" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEip6gPKjejdEtFXYUuKOLq6iHU_ftba-IbrdWfROZ-558HgHLkeb5USroduQCQ7o2Libb5-HL0C8Xo0xQrQZdx8b8Tr68QavpAurzG8Lx3PlqsBl4wBGGOCwi6v3jY0gtuQS75cwUV9Ecs3m1E_eZFuPTpFXPyR52cXYc6bjUf1VYhg_aEzMC_nPpFG/w256-h400/scream6.jpg" width="256" /></a></td></tr><tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://www.rottentomatoes.com/m/scream_vi" style="color: #741b47;" target="_blank">source/RT</a></td></tr></tbody></table><br /><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;">We've all seen the trailer. This is the "final trailer."</div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: center;"><iframe allow="accelerometer; autoplay; clipboard-write; encrypted-media; gyroscope; picture-in-picture; web-share" allowfullscreen="" frameborder="0" height="315" src="https://www.youtube.com/embed/1Ie2qmAOc6Q" title="YouTube video player" width="560"></iframe><br /></div><p></p><p><br /></p><div style="text-align: left;">Shawn & I saw this on the Sunday of opening weekend and I am just behind on posting about it.</div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;">There are a lot of things to love about Scream VI. <br /></div><div style="text-align: left;">There are also some definite missteps and some things I honestly don't know how I feel about yet. </div><div style="text-align: left;"> </div><div style="text-align: left;">Going to the theater is an <span style="color: #990000;">experience</span>. First of all, often movie-going - for myself or for both of us - includes family. Often we are going with my brother, sister, and nephew, or some combination thereof. </div><div style="text-align: left;">So there is the fun and the socializing and the anticipation and the popcorn and the audience uniting in their desire to see this story play out. I genuinely believe this can sometimes play a factor in how movies are judged, both initially and in retrospect. </div><div style="text-align: left;">Everyone has a movie they had an opinion about in when it was in theaters, and changed when they watched it at home. (Obviously there are SO MANY other factors, but I'm not actually here to analyze all the various factors that influence how someone views a film.)</div><div style="text-align: left;"><u><br /></u></div><div style="text-align: left;"><u>What was good:</u></div><div style="text-align: left;"> - Some of the scenes had excellent suspense, even if you kind of knew how it was going to play out, it was still gripping, edge-of-your-seat fun.</div><div style="text-align: left;"> - Jenna Ortega is, as always, in top form.</div><div style="text-align: left;"> - Delightful visuals. </div><div style="text-align: left;"> - Just good popcorn fun.</div><div style="text-align: left;"> - I enjoyed the intro with Samara Weaving; it was a delightful & unique opening mini-story to introduce us to this installment. <br /></div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;"><u>What was bad:</u></div><div style="text-align: left;"> - The killer(s) are pretty easy to identify</div><div style="text-align: left;"> - Plot holes like swiss cheese.</div><div style="text-align: left;"> - We don't really get to know the new members of the cast. While Scream (5) had all new cast members, we were still able to get to know each and every one of them sufficiently to know who they were and what they are about. </div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;">I don't know:</div><div style="text-align: left;"> - The motive(s). I mean. I guess? The trailer plays it up as "I'm something different" - but like, is it though? Especially since Scream (5) had the whole "something feels different" thing going in promotion as well. And don't quote me on this, because I could be 1000% wrong, but didn't Scream 4 also say "something is different"? I honestly can't remember. </div><div style="text-align: left;">- People who should've died not dying. I am of two minds on this. I know they want for characters to go on for the sequels, but it honestly feels like the stakes were as low as in <i>Rise of Skywalker</i>. </div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><tbody><tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjUqECihtT-k2d63xaUzUe0UPch9OV-Iycbe_4P2cr6jQdRCM5sNwByFpJ58W6NhCg_8VrCkrOOnvseCJE8eBdGPHuFOw5uAplDG6YqryrNh8cYkSr7-p5gC6O-Wkb4rZzTqxGTaJICrGydV-goG7A65HV_5ZrFxDqwJoesq_Toz8PMXBio_IeyAdPM/s1057/nobody%20dies.PNG" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" data-original-height="323" data-original-width="1057" height="158" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjUqECihtT-k2d63xaUzUe0UPch9OV-Iycbe_4P2cr6jQdRCM5sNwByFpJ58W6NhCg_8VrCkrOOnvseCJE8eBdGPHuFOw5uAplDG6YqryrNh8cYkSr7-p5gC6O-Wkb4rZzTqxGTaJICrGydV-goG7A65HV_5ZrFxDqwJoesq_Toz8PMXBio_IeyAdPM/w519-h158/nobody%20dies.PNG" width="519" /></a></td></tr><tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">(George of the Jungle) -<span style="color: #741b47;"> </span><a href="https://quotegeek.com/quotes-from-movies/george-of-the-jungle/1893/" target="_blank"><span style="color: #741b47;">source</span></a><br /></td></tr></tbody></table><br /><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;">It detracts from the emotions of the scene (where you thought they died) - I feel like it could work out in the long run for Scream 7, but we'll have to see how it plays out. </div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;">For now, I'm giving it a C+</div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="background-color: #f1c232;"><br /></span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="background-color: #f1c232;">Heads Up:</span> Language I think? Gore, violence. </div><div style="text-align: left;"> </div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjRXrl89moYwtQIHm3SzqW0LRaRsWRsjS6tqxRUhDkGS0lpB4h-LpO-2V1-6IG0bDIyNLur0JpbKkif3zmDfxu8huQFPo5OkDDvfVNMnC8Z5PZh0xeoiVCYwGCKkegXdSXOQoL6GtGvcGjX1qY3S4f3eirsYjzfWQYHQRxw-4-16wEW_-jA5eELKD2U/s640/filmfridaywithusob.png" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="360" data-original-width="640" height="225" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjRXrl89moYwtQIHm3SzqW0LRaRsWRsjS6tqxRUhDkGS0lpB4h-LpO-2V1-6IG0bDIyNLur0JpbKkif3zmDfxu8huQFPo5OkDDvfVNMnC8Z5PZh0xeoiVCYwGCKkegXdSXOQoL6GtGvcGjX1qY3S4f3eirsYjzfWQYHQRxw-4-16wEW_-jA5eELKD2U/w400-h225/filmfridaywithusob.png" width="400" /></a></div><br /><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6324292368020413992.post-18345459763070330272023-03-22T19:50:00.005-04:002023-03-22T20:54:59.206-04:00Something I Have Been Holding Back<div style="text-align: center;"> <br /></div><div style="text-align: center;"><iframe allow="accelerometer; autoplay; clipboard-write; encrypted-media; gyroscope; picture-in-picture; web-share" allowfullscreen="" frameborder="0" height="200" src="https://www.youtube.com/embed/0XcN12uVHeQ" title="YouTube video player" width="250"></iframe><br /></div><p></p><p style="text-align: center;">There is Something Wrong With Me.</p><br /><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiep7rD3tU-uWHQJQZ7wdLGIEnxSqrdxe96aIGtQ3o5eDNMfic9bfeTIRw_3PLPR60YyhuN3PJm-A2xAjs7XnkNlT-w02DpVeZT0TREQJcOK4gn7zrKWoU8_jBLuNsI6nNikNvR7DtpvjhzesUds1ONFFWXfdcT40Kz7LFZa7j_1kHlHYPkEvp5VMn-/s714/dividerflourish.png" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="120" data-original-width="714" height="68" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiep7rD3tU-uWHQJQZ7wdLGIEnxSqrdxe96aIGtQ3o5eDNMfic9bfeTIRw_3PLPR60YyhuN3PJm-A2xAjs7XnkNlT-w02DpVeZT0TREQJcOK4gn7zrKWoU8_jBLuNsI6nNikNvR7DtpvjhzesUds1ONFFWXfdcT40Kz7LFZa7j_1kHlHYPkEvp5VMn-/w400-h68/dividerflourish.png" width="400" /></a></div><p></p><div style="text-align: center;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: center;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;">I do not know what. </div><div style="text-align: left;">The many doctors I have seen don't know what. </div><div style="text-align: left;">They have suspicions of varying likelihood.</div><div style="text-align: left;">There are a couple of front-runners which I will not yet name here.</div><div style="text-align: left;"> </div><div style="text-align: left;">I am not yet willing to share all my symptoms, mainly because I desperately want to hear that X, Y, or Z is just part of aging, or is such-and-such, with an easy fix. </div><div style="text-align: left;"> </div><div style="text-align: left;"> </div><div style="text-align: center;"> </div><div style="text-align: center;"><iframe allowfullscreen="" class="giphy-embed" frameborder="0" height="360" src="https://giphy.com/embed/l1KumjgMyx2D7KESI" width="480"></iframe></div><p><br /></p><div style="text-align: left;">Because the truth is - I'm scared. </div><div style="text-align: left;">Even the mildest, simplest, most hey-that's-not-so-bad of the front runners is a life changer, forcing me into yet another New Normal. </div><div style="text-align: left;"> </div><div style="text-align: left;">I'm feeling a lot of things. </div><div style="text-align: left;">Anger. Rage. Frustration. Fear. Grief. Overwhelmed. Hopeful? Lost. Trapped. Desperately worried. <br /></div><div style="text-align: left;">I try not to focus on it too much, not to allow my thoughts to drift too deep into Anxiety Alley. I'm trying very hard not to allow myself to fall into Catastrophic Thinking. I am trying very hard to be positive, hopeful, optimistic. </div><div style="text-align: left;">I want to believe that once the experts I am being referred to can give me some answers, that we can develop a plan of care that will allow me to have my life back.</div><div style="text-align: left;">As of now, I worry that I will never have my life back. And to a point, I won't. </div><div style="text-align: left;">But I hope to find a way to be able to write again. To walk normally again. To regain control of my body.</div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;">I have reached out to my previous therapist and I am on her waiting list. The wait is considerable, but shit's not going anywhere, and she is fucking awesome and already knows me. </div><div style="text-align: left;"> </div><div style="text-align: left;">With my family, I have been very flippant and dismissive of symptoms. I am fairly private (believe it or not) and part of why I'm able to post this is because I know that my readers are in the single digits. With my family, I actually have only shared a few of the myriad symptoms I have. All for various reasons. </div><div style="text-align: left;">My little brother would worry himself sick. </div><div style="text-align: left;">My sister, god bless her, is the reigning queen of catastrophic thinking and also has no ability to keep shit to herself. All will be reported to the rest of the family in the most dramatic fashion possible.</div><div style="text-align: left;">And my dad. . .</div><div style="text-align: left;">is my dad. </div><div style="text-align: left;">He is extremely stoic and generally presents an unbothered front. In part due to Sister's efforts at <i>*Dramatization</i>. He does his best not to feed into the <i>*Dramatization</i>. He has dealt with severe hemophilia his entire life, where losing a tooth can (and did) result in hospitalization. (Treatment for this is significantly improved since his childhood. But it is still a looming threat and even a bad enough cut (which is not particularly bad at all) requires a transfusion.) So he has dealt with the shadow of the possibility of sickness, hospitalization, and death his entire life. His side of our family runs rampant with not insignificant diseases, injuries, and disabilities. </div><div style="text-align: left;">So his generally unbothered attitude is warranted and expected. It can also be dismissive. HE can be dismissive. As can my stepmom. </div><div style="text-align: left;">Which is why I don't feel I can discuss any of this with them until I know for sure what's going on. </div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;">I guess that contributes to feeling isolated, which is another reason why I decided to post this.</div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;">I will update as I learn more. In the meantime, I am being referred to the Neurology Dept. at U of M, but have no idea when I will see them. </div><div style="text-align: left;">So. In conclusion. . . <br /></div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: center;"><iframe allowfullscreen="" class="giphy-embed" frameborder="0" height="265" src="https://giphy.com/embed/LMc7w09YdCIKRpvBkS" width="480"></iframe></div><p><br /></p>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6324292368020413992.post-67244047543896670582023-02-19T20:31:00.004-05:002023-02-19T20:31:57.722-05:00Sunday Confessions: February 19, 2023<p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgRtzLRIhAgJBcKJjMe2o5WLxW2MrMfxlG9nUXk3kvY0ayzpDBAmpc7hw0iwPw60144PNnZFTsqrtMWzrV58mw04hjSPU_X1lE3oBDzCH96xXtjq1n8zs5yDMvvyFA4_8cy6egIpHqgJ2gEXdlBs1zOr7v34R8HrxBKO8oU1YuU-PFgfb45vC7MlSWX/s1920/SCGodiafont.jpg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1279" data-original-width="1920" height="213" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgRtzLRIhAgJBcKJjMe2o5WLxW2MrMfxlG9nUXk3kvY0ayzpDBAmpc7hw0iwPw60144PNnZFTsqrtMWzrV58mw04hjSPU_X1lE3oBDzCH96xXtjq1n8zs5yDMvvyFA4_8cy6egIpHqgJ2gEXdlBs1zOr7v34R8HrxBKO8oU1YuU-PFgfb45vC7MlSWX/s320/SCGodiafont.jpg" width="320" /></a></div><br /> <p></p><div style="text-align: left;"><b>I Confess:</b></div><div style="text-align: left;">Er...I dyed my hair purple today. And I am not really feeling it, tbh. I feel like I might appreciate this color more if I chop off some of my hair. It's a slippery slope. </div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;"><b>I Confess: </b></div><div style="text-align: left;">I have 3(!) appointments this Wednesday. </div><div style="text-align: left;">1.) 8:45 am - physical therapy </div><div style="text-align: left;">2.) 1:15 pm - a virtual evaluation to determine what would be the best fit for me in regards to group therapy for people with chronic pain & illness. </div><div style="text-align: left;">3.) 3:30 pm - a mammogram. My first ever mammogram. And to be honest, I am scared. I'm not worried they'll find anything; the only reason it's happening is part of basic preventative care for women my age. UGH.</div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjbK4IfaSMjn_Ix-tkx10qH1gxCNUUFc9PyIpPRU4R3QUZEjXME8MQ29oxC6jfUhZeN2LiiV2fDuUHMVU37ODYfveaAlyb7K1tDtEhSj_IpAecee57zEQSamEwz2GfDjGU6Zdxj8lD8hxlVTpPtZDigMu-OcImpc8iar6YSwErKHDU9Pz-0sC2e3ue6/s336/giphy.webp" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="336" data-original-width="271" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjbK4IfaSMjn_Ix-tkx10qH1gxCNUUFc9PyIpPRU4R3QUZEjXME8MQ29oxC6jfUhZeN2LiiV2fDuUHMVU37ODYfveaAlyb7K1tDtEhSj_IpAecee57zEQSamEwz2GfDjGU6Zdxj8lD8hxlVTpPtZDigMu-OcImpc8iar6YSwErKHDU9Pz-0sC2e3ue6/w258-h320/giphy.webp" width="258" /></a></div><div><br /></div><br /><div style="text-align: left;">No, I am actually a little scared of the procedure itself. And I'm not normally particularly scared of procedures. I've had so much shit done, it's like "yeah, yeah." I don't know. </div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;"><b>I Confess:</b></div><div style="text-align: left;">If alignment or sizing or anything is off, it's because I'm doing this on my phone and I'll fix it later. </div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;"><b>I Confess:</b> </div><div style="text-align: left;">It is crunch time for finishing the schooling for my licensure at work. I am 89.9% done. I have done all the units and am working through the last of the (required) review quizzes. Then the final exam. I have to be finished and pass said exam before the end of this month though. As of March 1st, they are switching to a new program - if I'm not certified before then, I'll have to start over. And, if I don't pass the final with the required grade, I will also have to start over.</div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh2xXRGk-6Thp9YSFBrL4F-hAhrSkWodtFfAfmsj5ex_0FHIDGtrpdH5xgYtIWf3fb_VvDxNJtikEbrDRrpO-W12YvqUyS_MiDqa7CGr0VpFXGwPngbGbupDBvj9yoJxcagyh100LEbqOIQqTF0MZoXtlNiKt5j70d12PXeU7EsOZ5DUOUEk5C5UfUM/s480/giphy%20(2).webp" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="480" data-original-width="480" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh2xXRGk-6Thp9YSFBrL4F-hAhrSkWodtFfAfmsj5ex_0FHIDGtrpdH5xgYtIWf3fb_VvDxNJtikEbrDRrpO-W12YvqUyS_MiDqa7CGr0VpFXGwPngbGbupDBvj9yoJxcagyh100LEbqOIQqTF0MZoXtlNiKt5j70d12PXeU7EsOZ5DUOUEk5C5UfUM/w320-h320/giphy%20(2).webp" width="320" /></a></div><br /><div style="text-align: center;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;"><b>I Confess:</b> </div><div style="text-align: left;">I am having acne breakouts for some random reason and I seem to be in the middle of a doom cycle of looking at myself and just being super critical of...well, myself. </div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgFT1B5OUadiNHYWEoKhNzKd2iVaJjEZAmcQUp8k31Jca-aajm6fMOUanRqM4SgXi9p1h1syI2dAEnMN-ZdwueOn5L729V7tuOE06z08Q4QHPD-1tphX0qFxqvq1HuYmtgDhF9dXWLf_QiYBSQb4PMwzWKxcbpdH-9QV85dK0dvYFyRvDGQ3L0gQ2XY/s478/giphy%20(1).webp" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="250" data-original-width="478" height="166" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgFT1B5OUadiNHYWEoKhNzKd2iVaJjEZAmcQUp8k31Jca-aajm6fMOUanRqM4SgXi9p1h1syI2dAEnMN-ZdwueOn5L729V7tuOE06z08Q4QHPD-1tphX0qFxqvq1HuYmtgDhF9dXWLf_QiYBSQb4PMwzWKxcbpdH-9QV85dK0dvYFyRvDGQ3L0gQ2XY/w320-h166/giphy%20(1).webp" width="320" /></a></div><br /><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6324292368020413992.post-27636675668599839812023-02-12T18:24:00.001-05:002023-02-12T18:24:55.068-05:00Sunday Confessions: February 12, 2023<div><p> </p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj9QmSdCPS-W9cgFc6wAWdD2PTcNba0n_BPP9LuRXIRtbCRhPTD_Av4J1boKhez9svqaXm6oPz4XPsv-bHj7LLVNHvctMcx1nmEzGROowhrgoNX1-3pOmV_AoyjGcoeDKe2Vtv4Au-l9PwzlUbdNRS4fDQ1NiYC9Z8vClAgTn6iMqgfgFHg7wbV3R8D/s2620/SC6920.jpg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="2620" data-original-width="2620" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj9QmSdCPS-W9cgFc6wAWdD2PTcNba0n_BPP9LuRXIRtbCRhPTD_Av4J1boKhez9svqaXm6oPz4XPsv-bHj7LLVNHvctMcx1nmEzGROowhrgoNX1-3pOmV_AoyjGcoeDKe2Vtv4Au-l9PwzlUbdNRS4fDQ1NiYC9Z8vClAgTn6iMqgfgFHg7wbV3R8D/w400-h400/SC6920.jpg" width="400" /></a></div><p></p><p><br /></p><div style="text-align: left;">I Confess: </div><div style="text-align: left;">Sometimes...men. Just ugh. Sometimes I just annoyed when Shawn does the husband-paying-attention thing. As in, I schedule an appointment a month in advance. I have to leave work early on Monday for this appointment and as such have to pick up Saturday. I mention it in conversation so. many. times. Monday comes and I physically leave work, do the appointment, come home, tell Shawn about the appointment and go over plans for the rest of the week, including Saturday. Friday comes and I mention that work should be easy tomorrow. Late Friday night comes and Shawn's all "I'm so glad I can sleep in because I don't have to drop you off at work." And I'm all..."Uh, YES I DO." And suddenly he's all cranky because he "didn't know" I had to work on Saturday. </div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: center;"><iframe allowfullscreen="" class="giphy-embed" frameborder="0" height="360" src="https://giphy.com/embed/3o6Zt2Q4g1AIROXFYI" width="480"></iframe></div><p><br /></p><div style="text-align: left;">I Confess: </div><div style="text-align: left;">I'm rooting for Kansas City. I have no particular reason why.</div><div style="text-align: left;"> </div><div style="text-align: left;">I Confess: </div><div style="text-align: left;">I am very excited for both <i>Scream 6</i> and <i>Renfield</i>. <br /></div><br /><br /></div>
<div style="text-align: center;"><iframe allowfullscreen="" class="giphy-embed" frameborder="0" height="259" src="https://giphy.com/embed/W7U8YuNwTBSrm" width="480"></iframe><br /></div>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6324292368020413992.post-39743596503995096082023-02-08T17:11:00.000-05:002023-02-08T17:11:16.645-05:00What I'm Watching:<div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div>
<p style="text-align: left;">1.) LOCKWOOD & CO. <br /></p>
<div style="text-align: center;"></div><div style="text-align: center;"></div><div style="text-align: center;"><iframe allow="accelerometer; autoplay; clipboard-write; encrypted-media; gyroscope; picture-in-picture; web-share" allowfullscreen="" frameborder="0" height="315" src="https://www.youtube.com/embed/7-iYxGLpQzo" title="YouTube video player" width="560"></iframe></div><p><br /></p><div style="text-align: left;">- I binged this in two days while I was off work with Covid. Enjoyed it enough that I checked the first two books in the series out of the library. Looking forward to season 2, assuming Netflix doesn't cancel it like they do with everything.</div><div style="text-align: left;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: left;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: left;">2.) THE LAST OF US</div><div style="text-align: left;"> - This show. Are you guys watching this show? Episode 3 ripped my heart out and fed it back to me to, then ran me up and down a gravel road and then sprinkled happy rain onto everything to really impact your world view.</div><div style="text-align: left;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: left;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: left;">3.) VELMA</div><div style="text-align: left;">- I don't know why I'm watching this show. I don't hate it with the vehemence most of the internet has for it. And yet. I don't like it, either. Yet somehow, I feel compelled to know what kind of stupid bad-fan-fiction bullshit is going to happen each week. </div><div style="text-align: left;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: left;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: left;">4.) EMILY IN PARIS</div><div style="text-align: left;">- Season 3 is taking me a long time to get through. It's the least interesting one so far. Also, I get that Emily is meant to be someone who is quirky and fun and romantic and wants to do the right thing and her efforts often backfire on her. But this season so far I have just been like "GET YOUR SHIT TOGETHER, YOU IMBECILE!"</div><div style="text-align: left;"> </div><div style="text-align: left;"> </div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: center;">
<iframe allowfullscreen="" class="giphy-embed" frameborder="0" height="270" src="https://giphy.com/embed/F4l69UBkYQ9tTnaaN7" width="480"></iframe><p><br /></p></div>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6324292368020413992.post-33928405589702702422023-01-19T16:45:00.044-05:002023-01-19T17:12:22.807-05:00This is What's Been Happening:<div><div><div style="text-align: center;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: center;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: center;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: center;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: center;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: center;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;">Oh man. </div><div style="text-align: left;">I have been absent for so long. And my most recent posts (from months ago) all had large gaps in between. </div><div style="text-align: left;">Here's what's been happening in my neck of the woods:</div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;">A lot of medical stuff.</div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;">◈ I just had a cardiac stress test for the first time yesterday. (Wednesday the 18th). It was a challenge and I didn't last very long. But I look forward to learning the results, even though I suspect they will be perfectly fine, (as in, I doubt there will be any tangible reason for the crushing chest pains I sometimes get). [Read: trust me when I say it's NOT anxiety.] The goal, however, is to get a cardiothoracic treatment plan going, even if that means being gentler with my exercise. When I get to exercise, because for the time being I am not, because of reasons.</div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: center;"><iframe allowfullscreen="" class="giphy-embed" frameborder="0" height="337" src="https://giphy.com/embed/24cbiZwzSW8Kc" width="480"></iframe></div><p style="text-align: left;"><br /></p><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;">◈ I have an upcoming <span style="color: #741b47;"><a href="https://www.mayoclinic.org/tests-procedures/emg/about/pac-20393913" target="_blank"><span style="color: #741b47;">electromyography</span></a></span> test to assess my carpal tunnel and cubital tunnel syndrome. I'm not exactly looking forward to the test, because I have had one before and it can be painful at times. But I am looking forward to figuring out all the shit and working toward repair and regaining proper use and sensation in my hands. Currently it is so bad I cannot put earrings in, or put on a necklace. Washing my hair is both painful and difficult when it's flared. I can barely type. I have very little control over where my fingers go and how much pressure is applied to a given key. My fingers slip around on the keys a lot. Carpal Tunnel is one thing, but chronic, ongoing Cubital Tunnel Sydrome just makes it all unbearable. (I am unable to hold hand weights and having my wrists bent at any angle (say, for push-ups or downward dog or anything like that is excruciating and causes a long and painful flare). <br /></div><p style="text-align: left;"></p><p style="text-align: left;"></p><p style="text-align: left;"></p><p style="text-align: left;"></p><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;">◈ Next week I have an audiology exam. I have been through several of these before, but it's been a while. The ultimate goal is to get at least one and hopefully two hearing aids! That would be great! Fingers crossed.</div><div style="text-align: left;"> </div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><table cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: left;"><tbody><tr><td style="text-align: center;"><img alt="&quot;What are you, deaf or something?&quot; - Squeamish Seal | Make a Meme" class="rg_i Q4LuWd" data-atf="false" data-deferred="1" data-iml="1655" height="256" 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STTxDRjDpRpGQ09xcUow5pwhJoyaop8K3IA91K0BqbwyO13PLQe87/L8a1jjyui3pOgTItlsCdzoST5dB+9RJEZmJufVtfgKn2/Tn8qEULMAK9Xk05yfUTg0mNwimLC4he6JJWOSPOELElsrBlNrm9jeoP8AdeOXFfbHxDjEE/4tky5LWyGIkDJbl113rVI0ce9r2+vX691dNxONzq1j0zb9due9Z0ulV2kfFYwCPE4kNGNe7jj7sFrEBmJZi1t8t7XpX4rjc8b/AGo5olZU/hR6K+UEEZddFXepLYb719Pfeo050Nrb/nV1E0hSSTPDDh2xLZMOyNGoSPwtGCEJOW7Wud96ssbxrGzRvE+LJSRGRx3UQurgqRcLcaE61SykIbjU9PrnVrgMM7AHr15CrMYgKJP9n+yic9xmz93kTfve9tntmtnHWjNhMU2GOFWciAsXyBEPi73vbBrZvb138qPiplgW+mnX8NfrSoGH7XJmswIHUa/71eGJtZyfapZ4sS2NvLEHVCEi0DizArlsb+fSlw0OKilnmXEuHxGTvW7uI5iisq2GWw0J260bC8VikHhax6bX86kh7Hf8POnCJtlcfwXFSYaPCfaRJh4mzIjIA4NnHtDUgB2sPd0q1wvFeKLDHGcWBkK2bulLsB7KMxNiNhqtzzOtWq4xVJzoCORtqbDlY67eX50xMVGURWU6LYMbDxAWByk338+VS4RdqrBwTpHiUXFMBiXkaQd3Gc7yAiQjw+Eb7bWofEIu6KqDdSBlPSw1B+udXkXDk1ZJBpYG59hb+EA/eZjsLX28rtxeCMiGNrIoPhJ2VtdWPM8rDQX1JItXPPGWNS6UEeMA0v7tDb0NLcttQliKsVKm40N9Px/S1SI5FGlxf3j5VxbCZDTRGasFYUxrVJAIppSrFRbV16gE600R1INqAxtQKVtTSKehvRQBQRMtNy+dSnFCy+X4UlDggNMdaJkNGWKgjQprrR7D1pe7ru7oOMdERBzpocCo7TXOhosSHYVJw0drDyqDGl2C351cZf4m3L5Xrt/in1jIyVrG1OZ+7Qtz6/nQGe7XvudPcPdVb2vxpjhtsToBfrp9adK67Z0qOIcWLEgNYdbn9vjVG2LTkWPmqsR8ba+lQ0xSvIAx8OwHn1PXyHlWlw/DI2XMcxsM3O3S/S1dJjL6zaj4Ti7oB4rr1JOnkRy+r1dcKlEkbPfdz6C21ZqUKSSoFgNethe3usR+NX/ZmO0QJ0LakfmOmlqxlj2so2GwmaTMRoP99+v6Va4PE+3ZfANj1f7wt0Gh6XvQi9h4dz0pw2sBoBoNvX66Ugp+0GFLKdyTr7hWPfCtfw/X1pXoRdWGU2J1NudhVY+Fiylr8/oWq0UvCgQwudenn9c602IlIjJD2I21+X1f9KYogOYHbWo0vFQwGXXW2tXeha4fGmQZXNmB5E7Dy0N6Is4yn2QCwsQt7e++xPXzqlxavH/EUkWNjbl5imwcRvexKkjU6Em2u30ang1WEx5SQm4CgW3BFtbgW233q8h4j3iC0ZLGwDPdstuUcaG2m+/rWRwxI38Kg3OoIe431XTfX1q1wWMYsB4suhJDyAHpZl3FTLsibx7g8rL3mR8yi5z5VzL1CJm+DNeqKJDaxa3SwA+O9a7CWlXxSZyLjKsci89i0hdvUEe6sxxXhyxSG8RytsbE29+YA1wyn10lBaexsWB99r1zT350kboNBe3mDoelyKesgO1q51REJp5bSme6lEZpsIKaXpTrpTe6qNCB6G0hpBcUjHrRkZMRcU7v6jXplGlliXsNKBBMTvSzC+xoDPloyltiK5ptKh3vrSAH0oCMxNDsRT1amvrQSuGMe8BPUD4kVcRtdib75hb/AGqhwk2RgejKfgQfwq6wwyyOhIIvcW3sevyrvhemahxPmAtbQn8+f7VQduWuIl5X35VaYaQLJIh+6xOvmfjUfjePhPhkUso2tcZfgfrWrKWPMcTEyMbjnaiQ4+ZFKJI6qdCoYgEGtaMLHL/hsDyysAbjodNfxoP90MhOWNFI1zW2HkSTb9631+We1fwdGUFWJGchmHMKPve87a9TWx4NJ4Sb2A293Lf6NU2FwpYjLci+pOpY8vOw0P0K00GBIULc677bfDp9aVdmtCpHfxXt0235b87++hviiuj2945ADQeZPlTcZCYyuRjoALX8IvuSBvYdevuqtxLlrI4LXYkaGw5i/l76qBtMe9BG2Vha/Miq3uyfDcrrfQ6eoqxSEgF8lmLDn56G/IW1tQ8ROsT2k3Iup6+8eVqdfUqmmjdWsx89NiPWrJMDGqg2Ggvc7+7p9e+onEJllsFNgoJG2/6fXKmpxDw5LZmGgA1+vWs2xqRPEgCsH89Oo5A9Kz+HNpNLCx/HzrQcK4DLI2eXRd8vM36/H8Ktm4TtYKmlgQB9cq53K1rirYHCpnYklXBvc3HQNbcbfWtSo8WFOVQEIuNrajW11ANjyNuvuoC4dhnW5NrH2dJLbfhakwcbMQxFhzv77+EgjTb61re001nAsaWbJYtv4c0h+JVr/wDKal8TwhkXKht1XvC1j93R0uvoetRuFQA6ge47N5EH8+XlVljZCwQE52B0vZX21ysLa25HXzNSzoY/xISGBDAlSLcx7ifw2NdEyudND8/3FXnHMKTaQakCz6Waw5sOtr6jQgeVVUGWuFmm5T0iNGtYUx5KA8hNZBFWkK0NJNKQzXoC2pjpeuVTvT1egG0elC7r31IDXNqL3Y60ENSRTJLk0WVTTkXSgYo6UYCkVrU3vNaDnFqCWvSzMTQ+4Y0EiFLrfz/SpWGfu3jkbXOTGxvzAFr/AF+0bBtbLGeeZvgRVhFhs0bxnY6r5MNQa74z+LO+0LtDF3cyyr7DWDenX8KpuKIWJIO+2mv7Vq4ovtELRuLMPCeoI2P10rLSo6AxtuNA37+elZ3ppmjgXDXS6nqCQfryqzjws0lhK7uOhOnqNr0eMMNh02+Zq04c+viW21jtpWuUNLDhHDDcbgC5PP4nSp+PwYUaNIdLXzsAOhBFviOvnU7AtlWyoWbQ22HvPPrqbDzqNxvDSMLyvtb+Gmg8sxv001JB1Aqys1nTHIrb3GYliSxPs2AGulrDl8qFmeyANrm8RYakXOluW9uv5q+n3r2JG5Iu2t7n2jfUDSmI6x2Y6lFIzE7A6m52vra5rW2dFmK29ouDJodwrKN/ICx9aoeKxySnLuQSRboSbD3Wq+WMsGS+RcmZT93XW2/kDTJQvhZVDWNmI0uRsT6n51LVQuB8DaQAscqm4Ftz7q0eA4PHGCI1tvmY6sfeaXh8q5CVtfS6ja/5MRf8/KbgXJa1rD6/ICsyLaNDEQoG/Kw8uvw/GlxS2U2UUcPkNlseZP5UMPmuDsb/AI8/WtJFWmGd9dLf7fXpUjBYBmNiLA/Q+vzqWGCkgEfXWpMeKym/Pl16g1m6Xadh8OI8qnY6XB2v9WvTsVAHkVG1CC+caMDfQm3Qi/TyFOwoLgu23ysLXqRgBYkn72o8gNAPhW/mmQsbhropazHYMNDcXBtysd7aA9DWK4rgjC/VGPha1rH+U+fnzrf49bZAObXI5ftUbF4FJkaJxoRp1B5EVnPDcWXTAxuTzqQludRsRhZMPIY5P+FuTDqP0oqOK4adIM2W1CRFvTWkG1DZ6iJxZaAbVEYmmqDRpJuL6cqJm86iJDbWna9KCSrg05WAqMISKQo1BMdL1wQUAFgNaUz2oyKY7U0m1Ik96R3HWge0ZvGw6lT+P51cYZNNPP4n96rsEMyug1Isw/A/lVzhFNh0t/veu+N6YvoBQpIGHsnRh1tzpONcNWRcwAuR7qtTADyoZiuMvnY+4chWMo3Kwow5R7bdSdvlufKtDHwseFrbc+fp/L6V3FOG31UWtVhw2bvU7sWzKPEeVtrAcz+FYnulqxEgWMKmgO2UaseeQc9d2On41T8Ru4eK2lrsgNwDa4zvuxItp0PPQi4hXLdF32ZzqSdgL9fkKqsf/wCRFcWNzIfFlI5/5nJG5873rrL0z9Y18gzKxva2cjTKADZFA2NvX1oUOMjIYsBckZumQcue+3qfKrfFYEHMslkRLZyD4CdGs3PmGPmR51SyYa4bKynMbWBGq7a29fnSZpp2LxrG4Ggy5r8j7IAB91NglOgjS+Z9fLa9z6fOnx4GRyL+H5+g+udWnCsGUOULrmvfmSTb03pyNFwGFZFNhbxXt7+XXyq8SIsF0yka/j+dCmkEfLX89P3+IpknEbkZbX0/2+ulOWjVWK4XMF+HpUieNIwdQDy/QfD5VUYbiDHwjU316dL3o4wBfxF7nzOgHQdazctroyTEalrWN/8Ab8qJgcK8jA2KrvrVtguHRp4j4iOuw9KNLiNNSAg1O31akm/UN4rjEgjBO21uZ8qrOD4ySdwdQoPz6msxxDGPjZwEuY1Nl93NvrlW34Vhlhj28Wn+1dMe7tL0vFQO2v3QR60JE/iH3iuwmg13Op9/Sp2HTUnrW2VXx3hscoyMLX1B5q3UV51jeHSQyZH25NyIr03jUwBjHPNUPHYFZoyrD3Hp0IrGeG2pdPPRF50bIBXcRgeF8reh5MOooAluK4adIlJGDTe6pIJRT2kAqKRUpPs48q7vxXfa6BH1rnQjakeQU1XYmjIlzSOgO9Jcg04tQDMNqjyREnepuakZRQJwFSJtTYMrL8r/AI1pYoyCDfXp5VnMOuV1bexHwuK1OB1up3/aumF6ZvqVERb3/Rogi57/AL9KC8ZTXlp8Pr8Kmol109OoubfmfnWlR2w4kW2y8z1tyH6/QzuPgeJw8eltDbTToPT4fCtYvhFgNth0tUeWIOMg3+83X3dT+GlYyxlJUPD4tZYwI/CVtmtuDsFTzJ58qMHMa5Si3bQMBseZtzCgfIczVDi+HyQyB4rqV1tyPv8AnRsN2kRg3eqUbLlBtdcttdOWY63/ANNJfyU7i3Bg4jQrmzEne+9ySRzb8bGo+H4JGhQJGbeG+h+9v8lY1cYTHLI7Sq1xqqlTfTmbb7/nQJHzuMspFiSOVsoCD43b51ek7RsRhgrAFDbLfb/Mg/P8aiy4tVWTKpvmNtD6Xqc4lEl1lBGUG5tzdbf9NPSWazXdNWJvYe78qejOTJJIbiNz0sp+tqPFwbEPqY8o6t4R861aSyEeKWw8jb8PfQ5XjXV5M1up0rPD81eSnw3Du7uFOduv3R+v7VYQYV767/W3lXNxePZAbdQPKqzH9qlj0vr0Gp9enrVnGF2v5GSNSXawAvqeVYTjnGmxLd1D/h8z/N5f6fxqLJicRjWC6hOnI+88/dWs4JwJIFDNbN510k3/AMZ3ovZrg4iUM3tEXNXcV3bNyF8v61GU943RR8yN67ifGosOtj4nOyDf16Vvc0i3klWNSWa2lFwGKzrm1/asVgZJcU93uFvovIe+tNi5hFGFUeI6Acyasv1ELF4jvcSFHspr6mr5F0qs4Pw/uxmbV21J6Va30qT9lUXG+HLMpRt90bofrlXn8kDxuyOLMp1/IivUn1NUnaHhwkGdR4wOXMdK5/5Md9xrGsai350hbWuEoBp4Iri6msbU2/nRgt6ZlHnQHAG9qUPrtRWQUgQUZKddae6C1NNqaW0o07JcVHINGQVzg0ZOwK3Zv9Dn1AvWkwJBytflWewbgOfcR6HSrvhYynKdPoV0x8StIY8y2OtxUJXMTAN7F9G/Kp2HIt9a1GxU6rdZBdTv+tWps/Fi63XmLkjkD086hHGquhIA/A66/nS4d2juVPeReWpX3+VJjuHJKuZDrbYdam9gskiuLXDK2mYbgbn3aX162qu4pwyN0ugFzoAOROl/TU+4Vn8Vh54ZLoWFgdttTsfhSL2mcN/Fj2vZk8JudL22On51nf5XQs/Zp0/wyQR+1QA+Mj5s2gHi8Q6/eB5mrzDdq4ifbt5OCP8AmFxUzD8UidRorX18JVuptpt+1Xc+nbJPxmcElo1bQD2bbXPIiuTjUmXWEdfvf91ax5YGButiSeXK2/y+dLnw3Qa8vrztTjj+U3WPbjUp9mIf83/dTBjMS20ajzC6/O/0K2ff4YbKPr6HzoD8YiQXAQe+35+ta1ibrNLwrFy6MWAPLYfAaVZ4DsiqeKQ3O9qXE9rowCM69PDry8qqsT2rZ/ZVj7zYUlxnkO610bxRLZAPfUHF8VRNZXC/5Rqx16cvWsocZiJNAcg/y6H470fA8CZjqCfOr/LJOk/E9ppH8MC5B/Nu3p0peE8HZ2DSXJJ3Opq7wHZ5UF2t9ftVnLi4oUJzAADfb1rUknoNhoUiTcX/ADqDi+JIHzGxfkP5P3rM8S7QtIbRk2/m5+nT62qTwLhbyNdtqcuXUNaavhU7yakafCrHEzWFBBSJLXGlVS4gyvYbVvxlaRNelcX5USCHLSuNaaGC7R8L7uTOvsOdujcx61AjiUit5xXBiSNkPMaHoeRrz4wsrlG0INq8+eOq6Y3aWAo0vS5VqKya12T3/GsKmMBbekzgChMum9ORNKB6NS5L0FQa4OaNJSILU5yCKhBj50lzV2kGhju2UbsGHqQbfO1aHhTrMisNGAsw6HrWZWQqQ3MEEemtXSRGGTPH7EniHubW3zrWPiWNJBMV35H4/X5UfEwCVdPX4VDhxSutjpR0cxm41U1rbOumWxqzQtdCR0HKmYLtMA38RTG38yjwn/Uv6VsZYklHLnWW4x2bO4GwqXD7F2uIeIRyC7WcaDMpuPXmOuvWos/Z+KUAoRc6/XrWCxGDliJKFltzFx8xSwdocXEf5vePzFvo1N2ew1Pi8x3Y9gSR9GqjEdm5F67VNw39oLiwlibTmpv+NuXnVnF2+wrHxgje5ZTtyrXVTtljw2ddnce4kUz7FiP/ADH/AKj9c626dq8C33k9bdPr407/AOoMFpqnxH19CrxxN1hF4bMd2f1J1oidnZGOik862p7TYQa5o/iKFN2zwwvlK7HYE6/VqaxN1RQ9kpNPD8auMN2Uyi5sKhz9uF1yq7HkAttPWq7E9rcQ+iRWGlszdNtBV3inbXxcNij1axsD8voU3FcbghF7qo6m2/T66VhXkxkujSZQeSj4a71JwPZN3a7XJ6tc1d5fE0l8R7bM91gUnlmIsP3qshwmIxDAyEny5D0rYYHsuiWLWHnVsrww6KLkdKcf7U3+FVwbswFsWrQT4uKBbD5b1U4ji0j+FBbp1+tqSHgsj/xJb2000vqQOe29OX9VuP2hd9JiX0vatLgeHiMDTWh4aWOPKqIbsQBax/kNzb2R449Tp4wDY7PXiBsCVNiA6kCwykJuM19C4F/yqz9pf0muaC1BHElYXym2ovtsAb+YsQQRe/K9Am4ii5rgjKLtqNBeQb3te8cg/wCDzW+tokNWS7WYCwEyjbRrdORrUNihtlN75d13zZLf1ED1HnaK0qSKV9rMACDbZ8oF+YvnUa7X1tY2zlJYsunn6Ti1d3vvqU/B3WQhcuU5StzY2cMyqdNGyqxt5eYvB+0L5159V0naVzNEBrq6r8WiIdKdENKWuooZpzbUtdVShugt6Vo8JrEl+ldXVcPWckhYxl+utHwzm5Xl0+FJXUz8IFjGMUllJtcb+6rXh+IZhraurqYepkZjuHRnden4VmMfwyLXw/V66urr8SM/PgE10qrmwidK6urB8AfBR39kc6SPh8f8o2/WurqkVLj4fGNhRo8Il9uv4ilrquInxYFNNOlW2E4XH0pK6txGhwnD41Aso2qPxDFsvs2Hp511dWr4mKEsjN7TE76X0ouCwyuwBvbyrq6vLl63fGkXBxwi6KL9TqeVCxMpNwdrj8a6urviwTDYdSb2IN7XDMDY2uND/lX+kdBRIcGnJbW2sWFvCNtegA92m1dXVsI2FSwGXTLoLmwGmgF7AeVNfCpr4eWup1F20Ouovc26knnXV1IG/ZludPPc75vf119+u9MkgUG4Gvi1ub+et762F+uUdBXV1Kim7RJ3UfeR3VvCuhNrNpttoNulYPIOldXVwz9bj//Z" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;" width="400" /></td></tr><tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Yes, actually.<br /></td></tr></tbody></table><div style="text-align: center;"></div><p style="text-align: left;"><br />
</p><div style="text-align: left;"> </div><div style="text-align: left;">◈ I was also finally able to get back into physical therapy for my leg/back for the chronic and often unbearable pain. Way back on September 7, I had an initial evaluation to set up a treatment plan. Then, on the 11th, I was hospitalized with a staph infection and all plans of PT went out the window. I was on a very strict routine of how much I was able to be up and moving around and putting any kind of pressure on my foot for months. My boot eventually came off and eventually I was able to be re-referred to PT. </div><div style="text-align: left;"> </div><div style="text-align: left;">Now, because of the odd combination of things falling apart on my body, there was serious concern among my medical team that I could have MS. Or something else, like a spinal tumor. So during my stay in the hospital back in September, they did an MRI on my brain & cervical spine, and then another MRI on my lumbar spine. </div><div style="text-align: left;">The brain one came back normal, a bit of arthritis in my neck. I was in hospital for infection and foot issues, so my primary team was composed of Podiatry and Infectious Diseases. No one particularly concerned about orthotics. The report on my lumbar came back with some spinal stenosis and "nothing remarkable." </div><div style="text-align: left;"> </div><div style="text-align: left;">Until LAST WEEK, when I had my first (new) consultation with my physical therapist. And we discussed the results of the MRI and she was like "you have a <span style="color: #741b47;"><a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OSHbuaG_5Zw" target="_blank"><span style="color: #741b47;">herniated disc</span></a></span> in L5 S1." </div><div style="text-align: left;"> </div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><iframe allowfullscreen='allowfullscreen' webkitallowfullscreen='webkitallowfullscreen' mozallowfullscreen='mozallowfullscreen' width='318' height='241' src='https://www.blogger.com/video.g?token=AD6v5dyiOcOsGEIdkwzxK70bMZHBim5_5H7FSuPLNXgNRBXsFAP8O9Xl7D6FBBckZKkYKTUfBJRL_vYa7CbBZDG47g' class='b-hbp-video b-uploaded' frameborder='0'></iframe></div><br /><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;">So next Wednesday is the start of physical therapy to work on opening up my joints, helping me move better, and relieve some of the pressure the herniated disc is putting on my nerves. For months, I have been walking with a noticeable limp that includes <a href="https://www.ninds.nih.gov/health-information/disorders/foot-drop" target="_blank"><span style="color: #741b47;">foot drop</span></a>. It is for this reason that I have been unable to do cardio exercise like walking or gentle aerobics or even gentle yoga. The pressure on my nerves from my lumbar has been so heavy for so long, some of my leg muscles are essentially paralyzed. I am on a strong muscle relaxer that I take pretty much every night before bed. Otherwise my back freezes painfully and I cannot move, my thigh muscles twitch involuntarily, and my calf spasms into a charley horse multiple times a night.</div><div style="text-align: left;">Hence, the no exercise right now. </div><div style="text-align: left;"> </div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi7okqlx8ztdROY94qTHhbOZ-LYlfiDy7UqSYKosqCWT4fMg7OIpwYJiqMy5_JmPSc8Zg3hEM-wsBrZO1WhaH7ODx6g8uJAu_PPVAObli4ofwabbKtEiMz9Zo8NR3sERKhd1krGdgQgNFCrJsfj8x2QZw8irVrGz49TyzDlJCAPsGZP4cw-42Ae74Uc/s1323/fancy%20purple%20divider.png"><img border="0" data-original-height="171" data-original-width="1323" height="51" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi7okqlx8ztdROY94qTHhbOZ-LYlfiDy7UqSYKosqCWT4fMg7OIpwYJiqMy5_JmPSc8Zg3hEM-wsBrZO1WhaH7ODx6g8uJAu_PPVAObli4ofwabbKtEiMz9Zo8NR3sERKhd1krGdgQgNFCrJsfj8x2QZw8irVrGz49TyzDlJCAPsGZP4cw-42Ae74Uc/w400-h51/fancy%20purple%20divider.png" width="400" /></a></div><p style="text-align: left;"><br /><br /></p><p style="text-align: left;">I want to feel better. I believe I am on finally on the path to feeling better. To getting myself back. Because right now, it feels like my life has been stolen from me. From my inability to use my hands to being unable to walk, bend, or stretch properly (not to mention the shooting, stabbing pains), I feel...well, it is hard. Perhaps I will write more on the psychological aspect in another post. But it is hard. </p><p style="text-align: left;">I am pleased to be on the path to a healthier and more productive future. (I believe.) But I am also impatient. Book the appointment, get the referral, book the referral appointment, schedule the test, take the test, come back for evaluation....the wheels of medicine move slowly. It is likely to be months before anything significant changes. I just. I want it now. I want it to be fixed NOW. </p></div><div style="text-align: center;"><br /></div><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /><div style="text-align: center;"><iframe allow="accelerometer; autoplay; clipboard-write; encrypted-media; gyroscope; picture-in-picture; web-share" allowfullscreen="" frameborder="0" height="315" src="https://www.youtube.com/embed/mrKbgnbEEZk?start=88&end=100" title="YouTube video player" width="560"></iframe></div>
</div>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6324292368020413992.post-84814528615055618712022-10-21T08:10:00.002-04:002022-11-09T10:48:35.725-05:00Film Friday: Halloween Ends<p> </p><table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><tbody><tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjOpNazS0BESwFpMldPvAK0B4Z8QoKamRbDMi4KtgftpS5wnf0Cfgn5D4IpVKosfzVCAzm1glLCt-4KbRrLgrCDsFUZjGV-aKH3dOMQJ5JZdqKP671xaJEgqNkGmitxfN8LOGZ97ai0Y9X_VxWCN_58Mi0xEaac7jVxAMvPgtDzqbgmAdhR_xvBv-RJ/s283/index.jpg" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" data-original-height="283" data-original-width="178" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjOpNazS0BESwFpMldPvAK0B4Z8QoKamRbDMi4KtgftpS5wnf0Cfgn5D4IpVKosfzVCAzm1glLCt-4KbRrLgrCDsFUZjGV-aKH3dOMQJ5JZdqKP671xaJEgqNkGmitxfN8LOGZ97ai0Y9X_VxWCN_58Mi0xEaac7jVxAMvPgtDzqbgmAdhR_xvBv-RJ/w252-h400/index.jpg" width="252" /></a></td></tr><tr align="center"><td class="tr-caption"><span style="color: #741b47;"><a href="https://www.imdb.com/title/tt10665342/?ref_=tt_mv_close" target="_blank"><span style="color: #741b47;">source/imdb</span></a></span></td></tr></tbody></table><div style="text-align: center;"><br /></div><p style="text-align: center;"></p><p style="text-align: center;"> </p><p style="text-align: center;"> I believe by now anyone reading this will have seen the trailer, but let's post it anyway.<br /></p><p style="text-align: center;">
<iframe allow="accelerometer; autoplay; clipboard-write; encrypted-media; gyroscope; picture-in-picture" allowfullscreen="" frameborder="0" height="315" src="https://www.youtube.com/embed/i_mAWKyfj6c" title="YouTube video player" width="560"></iframe> </p><p style="text-align: left;"> </p><div style="text-align: left;">Oh, what to say? </div><div style="text-align: left;">The number one problem I had with this movie is <a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgd8b6xWqhcE2HAfHhCv2KKl3enNmsm_OueHuOE0nQzMFdTxqU57p_sASgblv2sKYjlvK9iHdUd8tonTA_CCvBoSDk0JMm4FLQPwIBePm_qvTjtIZKoN5JG1EX4ypzqAyiuVEjAIJpAAZcqhFTr1SVvpJEPtdbbULwzz6wB0jpOKv5qoyS_YGnEAEIO/s521/mmcomplaint.PNG" target="_blank"><span style="color: #741b47;">spoiler</span></a>. </div><div style="text-align: left;">Like, WTF? </div><div style="text-align: left;"> </div><div style="text-align: left;">There were some good elements, and the cinematography was done well.</div><div style="text-align: left;">I liked Laurie Strode's house in the movie. Very cute. </div><div style="text-align: left;">Unlike many people, who lamented the death of Judy Greer's "Karen" in <i>Kills</i>, I was actually delighted when she bit it, even though the manner of carrying it out was a bit ridiculous, so I was totally fine with not having her character in this one. <br /></div><div style="text-align: left;">There were some rather creative kills. </div><div style="text-align: left;">Honestly? I liked the ending. </div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;">To me, this movie had a very strong "IT/Derry, Maine" vibe with how the story was told. Apparently most people say it's more tonally in line with "Christine." Potatoes/Potahtoes.</div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;">Jamie Lee Curtis was in top form as usual; Andi Matichak's "Allyson" was insufferable. I know what they were trying to do with her character, but I found it annoying and junior high more than anything.</div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;">Was this film good? </div><div style="text-align: left;">Sure, I guess. I understand exactly what they were saying/doing with this film, but I didn't enjoy the presentation. </div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;"><i>- Halloween</i> 2018 is a good movie that honestly could've been a good stand-alone if they had wanted; e<i>nding on that ambiguous note of the final shot of the movie. </i></div><div style="text-align: left;"><i>- Halloween Kills</i> is a fun enough film. It drags on a bit, and there are plenty of problems with the plot, but I would watch it if it was on, have some popcorn or have it in the background while I played Wizard 101. The "message" is heavy-handed, but it's a lot of what people want: Michael Myers killing the fuck out of lots of people. Not as good as 2018.</div><div style="text-align: left;"><i>- Halloween Ends</i> was mostly a disappointment. For me, it was trying so desperately to be Elevated Horror instead of just a good, fun, popcorn flick to wrap up an epic saga of villainy. It definitely tried too hard and came off like an awkward teen eagerly trying to fit in with the cool kids and looking worse for it. </div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;">D+<br /></div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="background-color: #f1c232;">Heads Up:</span> Language, violence, gore</div><div style="text-align: left;"> </div><div style="text-align: left;">Currently in theaters and streaming on Peacock. <br /></div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6324292368020413992.post-16750592497021791942022-10-15T06:19:00.002-04:002022-10-20T20:18:05.914-04:00Halloween Font: Blood Crow<p style="text-align: center;"> </p><p style="text-align: center;"> </p><p style="text-align: center;"></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://www.dafont.com/blood-crow.font" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;" target="_blank"><img border="0" data-original-height="91" data-original-width="370" height="79" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEilazytm0W1ZBv3AlFhPMTj77pOSFnfh42xLTeT-rX42O-j8Vkf5oTCk-0AgyncWHKoN6HFr4DjQ_-HSgt9n63LVRVBTi_g0S_2CUYzDmLfZmPuAbhVwEUVfxcrLRCPF-Im3NnvAf-6e11AQD4d2KTXipZXMWMlznNDMey2T4VvTZfMsF1XRlp3R3cF/s320/Blood%20Crow.PNG" width="320" /></a></div><p></p><div style="text-align: left;">Day by day, I feed the birds. I have fed them for years. The front yard is for Cardinals, Robins, Purple Martins. These beautiful birds dance about, singing their bright songs and flashing their plumage.</div><div style="text-align: left;">There is a spot on the side of my house, where a door leads from my kitchen to a cracked stone step down to the grass. This is where the Mourning Doves gather to have their secret conversations, often seeming to be in a world of their own. In the back yard, this is where the Ravens go. This is where the Crows come. This is where I sit and sip my tea. I watch them watching me. They regard all others with a dark, unblinking eye. The Crows have brought me precious gifts: a button; several rocks; a bent, ancient nail. Sometimes, when they bring these treasures, if I have been sitting still for a great deal of time, lost in the pages of a book I've read before, they drop their offerings into my tea cup. A metal bead will fall with a splash and a gloop! as it sinks to the bottom, adding an extra bit of flavor.<br /></div><div style="text-align: left;"> </div><div style="text-align: left;">Recently there has been quite a ruckus nearby. I can hear the grumbling echoes of bulldozers tearing down the forest to make room for some abomination or another. It makes me restless, my chest tight, to hear the constant noise over the symphony of birds. </div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;">For the past several days, the crows have have bequeathed to me their most valuable finds. A lock of hair; a bit of finger; a thick, heavy ring which left a satisfying thunk on the bottom of my porcelain mug. Yesterday, one of my beauties presented me with a perfectly round eye, blood-red nerves dangling from the still warm orb. </div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;">There is no noise today.<br /></div><p> </p><p></p><p style="text-align: center;"> </p><p style="text-align: center;"></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"></div><br /> <p></p><p style="text-align: center;"> </p><p style="text-align: center;"></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"> </div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"> </div><p></p><p style="text-align: center;"></p><p style="text-align: center;"></p><p style="text-align: center;"></p><p><span style="font-size: x-small;"><span style="font-family: verdana;"> </span></span></p><p><span style="font-size: x-small;"><span style="font-family: verdana;">I hope you enjoyed the story that accompanied this font. <br /></span></span></p><p><span style="font-size: x-small;"><span style="font-family: verdana;">Blood Crow is pictured at 48pt </span></span></p><p><span style="font-size: x-small;"><span style="font-family: verdana;">Click the image to go to link & download.</span></span><br /></p><p style="text-align: center;"><br /> </p>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6324292368020413992.post-10610356754236526232022-10-13T17:17:00.001-04:002022-10-13T17:17:02.566-04:00Antiques of Terror<p></p><p>Back in August, Shawn & I went to Toledo for a baseball tournament thing. During our time there, we went to the flea market/antique store. Here are just some of the things I found disconcerting.<br /></p><table align="center" br=""><tbody><tr><td style="text-align: center;"><br /></td></tr></tbody></table><table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><tbody><tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgK65HP98YpBzMEvn5vuKNqaU5Lpo8M1hVCg7GOcGpfHVJ6SVV8wffKr880R0H9dQjYuwQfFRPnr8wKNOXCgCVIlySqPI-taJ3z5PpRBRgn_jivZ2HCLa6fDlPdEP7GgbwMzMxS29fYLpX1nx0Qwc2T68VdSPi6t3kJjO7OspyflSD8breKEZcx1ZdN/s1265/Teapot.png" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1265" data-original-width="949" height="453" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgK65HP98YpBzMEvn5vuKNqaU5Lpo8M1hVCg7GOcGpfHVJ6SVV8wffKr880R0H9dQjYuwQfFRPnr8wKNOXCgCVIlySqPI-taJ3z5PpRBRgn_jivZ2HCLa6fDlPdEP7GgbwMzMxS29fYLpX1nx0Qwc2T68VdSPi6t3kJjO7OspyflSD8breKEZcx1ZdN/w340-h453/Teapot.png" width="340" /></a></td></tr><tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Odd.</td></tr></tbody></table><br /><p style="text-align: center;"><br /></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><tbody><tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEizd-tzH6PpT3fJRe3ADQ4_NXiaXHNk8NmDsQiI_6ifrS5aHSvnMAUOlb3rpcjkBB2gm7RF9Zva4z3qHMTYZzL--GUT0KGx0hK_bhaHFpqxg-xSxO-xH8rXsZAXnl0_IQh1jvJ3exfmiI8ufXf1MKGfmeEa2cF_7o-_fYuEfoDKri3qpd0nrd3Ct_Ut/s1132/judgementalduck.png" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1060" data-original-width="1132" height="537" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEizd-tzH6PpT3fJRe3ADQ4_NXiaXHNk8NmDsQiI_6ifrS5aHSvnMAUOlb3rpcjkBB2gm7RF9Zva4z3qHMTYZzL--GUT0KGx0hK_bhaHFpqxg-xSxO-xH8rXsZAXnl0_IQh1jvJ3exfmiI8ufXf1MKGfmeEa2cF_7o-_fYuEfoDKri3qpd0nrd3Ct_Ut/w573-h537/judgementalduck.png" width="573" /></a></td></tr><tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Judgemental duck judges.<br /></td></tr></tbody></table><br /><br /></div><br /><p></p><table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><tbody><tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiud4IsDiDOp_lLdLL8TDKg5InejICwguohznUsR5jDDrr4dd0nt1NA5LvBCSt3BFdZlJEtBm8tLfnzP1dWdm5uLanT6EAsrSIhz4H786j9W9RftHAmaLB-IXcBdqx__wDdtHRHPhqF4LdGWj_Z91J29EsKbuYE7jYmrxGF9SSqmpe9Ubw-N_ioyIVV/s1095/halloweendecor.png" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1095" data-original-width="1095" height="640" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiud4IsDiDOp_lLdLL8TDKg5InejICwguohznUsR5jDDrr4dd0nt1NA5LvBCSt3BFdZlJEtBm8tLfnzP1dWdm5uLanT6EAsrSIhz4H786j9W9RftHAmaLB-IXcBdqx__wDdtHRHPhqF4LdGWj_Z91J29EsKbuYE7jYmrxGF9SSqmpe9Ubw-N_ioyIVV/w640-h640/halloweendecor.png" width="640" /></a></td></tr><tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">I actually liked these. However, the one on the left looks like a Disney Channel made-for-TV-movie villain. The one on the right belongs in an episode of Supernatural.</td><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"> </td><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"> </td><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"> </td><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"> </td><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"> </td><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"> </td><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"> </td><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><br /></td><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><br /></td><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><br /></td><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><br /></td></tr></tbody></table><p></p><table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><tbody><tr><td style="text-align: center;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1095" data-original-width="1095" height="593" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi4PtBPZLbc7MMlrb7UmDf1RIvGA9T2X7urSLwZW62CCI0vUyJi5th-zG3UD-zKQvgtPad5OoiBxToU_MlV5mmS2iSyjZ_uwsIkn4MCgqutisT8qkG64tkkTYcu67Xdjf9vrCZOBL7oDwaErVeDzfsg5Ac2TH67a9gPwWaZSmcJhMxlG2rO8XOQoc-a/w593-h593/creepyfigurine(1).png" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;" width="593" /></td></tr><tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">What is happening here? The more you look at it, the more disturbing it becomes. What is going on with his left hand? Why is it partially brown? What is he holding? His wife's liver?<br /></td></tr></tbody></table><div style="text-align: center;"></div><p></p><p><br /></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgw-BeJWK6RR4y9T8p8hb235ctjiOc-kZlwQ3R5V51p81wgOnNaPASxiw7U5bXpd3ajBKSOpimfowDEnhUIChxvrnWmesEJ8vYQ6J8-9j6U8-tb7n6oEsfOfmgXtjiH1VUQ-o8WXMV6Zy762OvQv7rXGcbCw-LQURg0W5gtB58q-HtbF2yHoYicexXm/s4032/2022-08-26%2016.17.54.jpg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="3024" data-original-width="4032" height="480" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgw-BeJWK6RR4y9T8p8hb235ctjiOc-kZlwQ3R5V51p81wgOnNaPASxiw7U5bXpd3ajBKSOpimfowDEnhUIChxvrnWmesEJ8vYQ6J8-9j6U8-tb7n6oEsfOfmgXtjiH1VUQ-o8WXMV6Zy762OvQv7rXGcbCw-LQURg0W5gtB58q-HtbF2yHoYicexXm/w640-h480/2022-08-26%2016.17.54.jpg" width="640" /></a><table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><tbody><tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEib5gKZANP4BMZeOZMiEnSgVvNhx89N5LZy-Mv06ZSE8FQEUQfzi6tv_190GgFmuOhpHS5GmuTY7RizJgefP3sWuz5qZGfs6pHTSN7dOaO91nJcfJJEBFHPR1HlJjcybz-XHmqZVcl__4ksA-czFajPZVt9zM8N9e4-gfgsFCr7s06dSBlEkFW9_n8-/s4032/2022-08-26%2016.17.50.jpg" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" data-original-height="3024" data-original-width="4032" height="480" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEib5gKZANP4BMZeOZMiEnSgVvNhx89N5LZy-Mv06ZSE8FQEUQfzi6tv_190GgFmuOhpHS5GmuTY7RizJgefP3sWuz5qZGfs6pHTSN7dOaO91nJcfJJEBFHPR1HlJjcybz-XHmqZVcl__4ksA-czFajPZVt9zM8N9e4-gfgsFCr7s06dSBlEkFW9_n8-/w640-h480/2022-08-26%2016.17.50.jpg" width="640" /></a></td></tr><tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">After seeing the fisherman of death, I was walking along and felt a chill on the back of my neck. I felt like I was being watched. Actually got goosebumps - not the good kind. I looked up and saw this nightmare speaking to me. It honestly felt deeply ominous and I was genuinely unnerved.<br /></td></tr></tbody></table></div><p></p><p><br /></p><table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><tbody><tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEghgoUIQDeRYW3Z9cj3Bp1iWaO01YOqb1rBgjeRa5Q3gCheMo-M2SGAm0J57Mf2n7BYf1deM3v6xuvz5Z1x1P7X3x5nGI5SkZDBLRHDXbAbJcEdWiMsDuNzC_ZGwgFqw-UW9Tq6uEJxTIJhzvflG6XvFpnKMnsaDNB49XNaHtMdQkP6GumA4O1vYGRe/s1259/evilbaby.png" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1259" data-original-width="953" height="640" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEghgoUIQDeRYW3Z9cj3Bp1iWaO01YOqb1rBgjeRa5Q3gCheMo-M2SGAm0J57Mf2n7BYf1deM3v6xuvz5Z1x1P7X3x5nGI5SkZDBLRHDXbAbJcEdWiMsDuNzC_ZGwgFqw-UW9Tq6uEJxTIJhzvflG6XvFpnKMnsaDNB49XNaHtMdQkP6GumA4O1vYGRe/w484-h640/evilbaby.png" width="484" /></a></td></tr><tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Chucky's cousin?<br /></td></tr></tbody></table><br /><br /><br /><table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><tbody><tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg3qrrmEVJWbWYSY5m4f8U3hhQojSKjz1xrWnNSF_bgEMPEzx9ztRL_Kcd2_1TK4mZPFOgpYkA9NKchBvGe-gyfEe2di0QgdzL2JH-WZwGOYxqTeAFEkIombuXWEb8rc5ebW8njgJ7iC2izBJj4dPP87B8nmMVJig8CgT4bIlDHAwIS8lzBBK9M7wfG/s1232/cursedpainting.png" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1232" data-original-width="974" height="640" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg3qrrmEVJWbWYSY5m4f8U3hhQojSKjz1xrWnNSF_bgEMPEzx9ztRL_Kcd2_1TK4mZPFOgpYkA9NKchBvGe-gyfEe2di0QgdzL2JH-WZwGOYxqTeAFEkIombuXWEb8rc5ebW8njgJ7iC2izBJj4dPP87B8nmMVJig8CgT4bIlDHAwIS8lzBBK9M7wfG/w506-h640/cursedpainting.png" width="506" /></a></td></tr><tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Oh yeah, this painting is cursed. <br /></td></tr></tbody></table><p></p><br /><table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><tbody><tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiiQmFwcOnFsknAKiLOCvi_rJTuvWzv7zrjObV67jlZDZ-7x2_nO28Mj6Iv2RkU8DqyKoJ4sx3EAVkFhNo_2r__7wIUycAHgPH52X2sChs3U6Bofa_tYJww50upyN06awVxjM8nOs1zLtak7BBaDx8hfE1VLDdmfPyX1-hdzNY65g4R6VCAKzIlLcb7/s1095/creepybaby.png" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1095" data-original-width="1095" height="640" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiiQmFwcOnFsknAKiLOCvi_rJTuvWzv7zrjObV67jlZDZ-7x2_nO28Mj6Iv2RkU8DqyKoJ4sx3EAVkFhNo_2r__7wIUycAHgPH52X2sChs3U6Bofa_tYJww50upyN06awVxjM8nOs1zLtak7BBaDx8hfE1VLDdmfPyX1-hdzNY65g4R6VCAKzIlLcb7/w640-h640/creepybaby.png" width="640" /></a></td></tr><tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Sam Raimi has nightmares about this doll. I could make up all the stories about this murder doll.<br /></td></tr></tbody></table><p></p><p><br /></p><br /><table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><tbody><tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhqqQriN-0n7wQmt68CzC7XOUXHx8v9xaNNbDurj4enL_v7qUQaM1pwAU_V70xJb75zr7zarWIN597X-mWWFOFAZ7f4Wh9wpofuCxQhR7txAjlVvMIRq36fYDwjgB7PqyNKKpmO56IgFKfVjU4B3ihqCVKRhzvjY3U2n1qJUuFGR4yg1xOFsjVnk-1g/s4032/2022-08-26%2016.53.42.jpg" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" data-original-height="4032" data-original-width="3024" height="640" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhqqQriN-0n7wQmt68CzC7XOUXHx8v9xaNNbDurj4enL_v7qUQaM1pwAU_V70xJb75zr7zarWIN597X-mWWFOFAZ7f4Wh9wpofuCxQhR7txAjlVvMIRq36fYDwjgB7PqyNKKpmO56IgFKfVjU4B3ihqCVKRhzvjY3U2n1qJUuFGR4yg1xOFsjVnk-1g/w480-h640/2022-08-26%2016.53.42.jpg" width="480" /></a></td></tr><tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Burn it with fire! Then pour holy water on the ashes. Then put those ashes in a salt-filled iron box. Then nail an iron cross to the top of that box. Then bury that box (deep) on consecrated ground!<br /></td></tr></tbody></table><br /><p style="text-align: center;"><br /></p>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6324292368020413992.post-86857835946734473012022-10-10T04:21:00.004-04:002022-10-10T04:21:49.941-04:00Sunday Confessions: October 9, 2022<p> </p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiTh9WJC7gbJetMJoNaqbTYzmsCV7RwWuVCfKq2u1eq35xHaM-amMvXLv_4-ssiguUBrJdnFXYxk1IYDkcZxqCIiXo39y-wwYnDsi2uINGsPlsphFJOBQ_2eIRD5HDnmy1gsq31zIKIBi1kc2pnft3y0OPPhwiNvvH5oFIDNiGno6QSrp5tZvmhFG-p/s256/133.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="194" data-original-width="256" height="277" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiTh9WJC7gbJetMJoNaqbTYzmsCV7RwWuVCfKq2u1eq35xHaM-amMvXLv_4-ssiguUBrJdnFXYxk1IYDkcZxqCIiXo39y-wwYnDsi2uINGsPlsphFJOBQ_2eIRD5HDnmy1gsq31zIKIBi1kc2pnft3y0OPPhwiNvvH5oFIDNiGno6QSrp5tZvmhFG-p/w365-h277/133.jpg" width="365" /></a></div><p></p><p><br /></p><div style="text-align: left;"><b>I Confess: </b></div><div style="text-align: left;">I can't seem to find the actual SC banner I wanted to use, so rather than digging for wherever in my files it migrated to, I'm just using the one above.</div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;"><b>I Confess:</b></div><div style="text-align: left;">Since being home from hospital this time around, I have been playing SO MUCH Wizard 101. So much.</div><div style="text-align: left;"><b><br /></b></div><div style="text-align: left;"><b>I Confess: </b></div><div style="text-align: left;">I have deep seated anxiety about my recovery as it relates to the other problems I was having with my legs and spine. So much I try not to think about it.</div><div style="text-align: left;"> </div><div style="text-align: left;"><b>I Confess: </b></div><div style="text-align: left;">This recovery has been painful. Thank god for pain meds!</div><div style="text-align: left;"> </div><div style="text-align: left;"><b>I Confess:</b> </div><div style="text-align: left;">I feel like an asshole because of my lack of blogging. But at the same time, my hands are in TERRIBLE shape and as much as I want to blog, typing is hard, yo. I am desperate to get my hands fixed. I guess I'm just feeling a bit defeated & anxious right now.<br /></div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6324292368020413992.post-21797483202137490542022-07-24T17:02:00.002-04:002022-07-24T17:02:30.507-04:00Sunday Confessions: July 24, 2022<p> </p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhuNCZO15oIh6Lsu3ncx-sp4FqO48Jy3OWRYjjZMOPnobLGLln6jtG0p3Wrp6-ceeDrWinz7RA0jxOl0GEN9WfyKjQD4opBLot5NL_A2PzGglDlkcJ3jrA17_VyTCGsUWl9hlJnkUabMCfNGbyJIlBk2UJbGaDt9N9ZM5N4jzvhuXQQTmnSfnjr0BBb/s6000/sundayconfessionssummer2022(1).jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="4000" data-original-width="6000" height="391" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhuNCZO15oIh6Lsu3ncx-sp4FqO48Jy3OWRYjjZMOPnobLGLln6jtG0p3Wrp6-ceeDrWinz7RA0jxOl0GEN9WfyKjQD4opBLot5NL_A2PzGglDlkcJ3jrA17_VyTCGsUWl9hlJnkUabMCfNGbyJIlBk2UJbGaDt9N9ZM5N4jzvhuXQQTmnSfnjr0BBb/w588-h391/sundayconfessionssummer2022(1).jpg" width="588" /></a></div><p></p><p><br /></p><div style="text-align: left;"><b>I Confess:</b></div><div style="text-align: left;">I am waiting for my insurance card in the mail and I feel like it's been forever.</div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;"><b>I Confess:</b></div><div style="text-align: left;">The Battle of the Cat Hair is lost. Our boys are shed machines. I surrender.</div><div style="text-align: left;"> </div><div style="text-align: center;"><img alt="Tired Giving Up GIF" class="giphy-gif-img giphy-img-loaded" height="300" src="https://media3.giphy.com/media/bq6F8QYqBU7Yc/200.gif?cid=ecf05e47wnbdyls8yh4xawq1966kqsypitjntpr0mmt9zoeh&rid=200.gif&ct=g" style="background: rgb(0, 255, 153) none repeat scroll 0% 0%;" width="400" /> </div><div style="text-align: center;"> </div><div style="text-align: left;"> </div><div style="text-align: left;"><b>I Confess:</b></div><div style="text-align: left;">No, seriously. My apartment is just trashed. I would be super embarrassed to have anyone drop by right now. </div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;"><b>I Confess:</b> </div><div style="text-align: left;">I enjoy TikTok, but at the same time, it makes me hate people. </div><div style="text-align: left;"><b><br /></b></div><div style="text-align: left;"><b>I Confess:</b></div><div style="text-align: left;">I had to surrender and go to the doctor and I came out with a double ear infection, sinus infections, and UTI. I am on a 10-day course of antibiotics and I just get very fed up with being sick. <br /></div>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6324292368020413992.post-62324391140435936362022-07-20T16:48:00.004-04:002022-07-21T21:41:58.948-04:00On Neptune<div style="text-align: left;"> DISCLAIMER: This story is not unhappy, just so you know.<br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi60MuWV_mOs445BFVVwH5-JuJLGrhfkWzEHw07Cefa7oXCVzdgh3FzBeSwQB8VAtWlDEBxz8yaI0cOoRgbN2Sikg75HJaVmc0wghhKrdH99o3lwtp3pYXPziynkJP_omz3UGZGxlDPG-RKx9NEV4YECJjSWihH-1tfMJzKS2getrEPJMN-cRitrADm/s2000/Blank%202000%20x%202000.png" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="2000" data-original-width="2000" height="640" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi60MuWV_mOs445BFVVwH5-JuJLGrhfkWzEHw07Cefa7oXCVzdgh3FzBeSwQB8VAtWlDEBxz8yaI0cOoRgbN2Sikg75HJaVmc0wghhKrdH99o3lwtp3pYXPziynkJP_omz3UGZGxlDPG-RKx9NEV4YECJjSWihH-1tfMJzKS2getrEPJMN-cRitrADm/w640-h640/Blank%202000%20x%202000.png" width="640" /></a></div></div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;">If you follow my instagram, <span style="color: #741b47;"><a href="https://www.instagram.com/unitedstatesofbecky/" target="_blank"><span style="color: #741b47;">@unitedstatesofbecky</span></a></span>, or the 'gram dedicated to our kitties, <a href="https://www.instagram.com/thecastorandpolluxshow/" target="_blank"><span style="color: #741b47;">@thecastorandpolluxshow</span></a>, you will know that back in mid-November, Shawn & I rescued a 4 week old kitten that for a few months we thought was a baby girl. <br /></div><br /><div style="text-align: left;">We have doted on Neptune right from the start, and it didn't take very long for his big brothers to embrace him as well, with Pollux taking in roll of nanny.</div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;">At Neptune's first vet visit, we learned - Surprise! It's a boy! Just very tiny testicles! - Also we learned that our new baby for some reason had no molars or back teeth of any kind. </div><div style="text-align: left;">The vet was kind of like "I've seen kittens with impacted molars before, but in all the years I've been doing this I've never seen one where there's just...nothing. No back teeth at all."<br /><br /><div style="text-align: center;"><iframe allowfullscreen="" class="giphy-embed" frameborder="0" height="270" src="https://giphy.com/embed/CJ54DTLLDVLy97Qj6T" width="480"></iframe></div><p><br /></p></div><div style="text-align: left;"></div><div style="text-align: left;">Regardless of his teeth situation, Neptune ate just like the other boys, and he ran and jumped and played and was full of piss and vinegar. </div><div style="text-align: left;"> </div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiQ_0snOlzORNfzIUcftwsFlq7dgDdEExKeNEtTNSXUjGfNoh8WDQ6XRNSkPF4kHkKqyH1Y5MU3JIzaV8KNd-g-LCzmGzT7rxVG2tTlQ4x4tzjk4cFOGrsL6WFYJYDfF-XXCaAxMDptPLWz1Nh9vInrRX2WpykHxTr0gGO1y6N3-8ptImPsvoj-r6i2/s4032/2021-11-28%2008.02.21.jpg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="3024" data-original-width="4032" height="419" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiQ_0snOlzORNfzIUcftwsFlq7dgDdEExKeNEtTNSXUjGfNoh8WDQ6XRNSkPF4kHkKqyH1Y5MU3JIzaV8KNd-g-LCzmGzT7rxVG2tTlQ4x4tzjk4cFOGrsL6WFYJYDfF-XXCaAxMDptPLWz1Nh9vInrRX2WpykHxTr0gGO1y6N3-8ptImPsvoj-r6i2/w559-h419/2021-11-28%2008.02.21.jpg" width="559" /></a></div><br /><div style="text-align: left;"><br /> </div><div style="text-align: left;">We did notice there were some things that were unique, however. </div><div style="text-align: left;">Neptune was never a "jumper." I mean, as a baby, he was fearless to the point of being reckless with jumping OFF of things. But when it came to jumping UP, he just didn't. He always preferred to climb using primarily his front paws. We also noticed a bit of palsy in his hind area. His little butt and tail would just have this tremor, almost like someone with Parkinson's. It mostly came out when he was excited about something. We also noticed that once in a while he would try to take a step, but he was shaking, and appeared like he had to really think through the process of taking that step, or whatever movement he was doing. Sometimes it was like he was thinking so hard his head would wobble. We would later learn these are called <span style="color: #741b47;"><a href="https://lifewithchcats.com/what-is-cerebellar-hypoplasia/head-tremors-cerebellar-hypoplasia/" target="_blank"><span style="color: #741b47;">Intention Tremors</span></a></span>.</div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="color: #741b47;"><a href="https://youtube.com/shorts/lpDd1i3udr4?feature=share" target="_blank"><span style="color: #741b47;">Here</span></a></span>, if you watch closely, you can see a bit of tremors. Mostly it just appears to be normal kitten shakiness. </div><div style="text-align: left;"> <div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div></div><div style="text-align: left;">Over the months, he was also struggling with the occasional bout of diarrhea.<br /></div><div style="text-align: left;">We went BACK to the vet. He had already been cleared of parasites and disease, so with those routes clear, another exam came to the conclusion that he has <a href="https://www.google.com/search?client=firefox-b-1-d&q=cerebellar+hypoplasia" target="_blank"><span style="color: #741b47;">Cerebellar Hypoplasia</span></a>. </div><div style="text-align: left;"> </div><div style="text-align: left;">We also learned his back teeth had grown in. YAY! We had been slowly experimenting with his diet, but it seemed like the diarrhea was getting more frequent, no matter what we did. </div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;">We also noticed he had slowed down. He didn't run around and jump and play. In fact, he was doing everything to avoid walking. </div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;">Another trip to a different vet, one that specializes in orthopedic services, confirmed the CH. But a more in-depth exam showed he also has <a href="https://www.google.com/search?q=luxating+patella+in+cat&client=firefox-b-1-d&source=lnms&sa=X&ved=2ahUKEwioiLOPooj5AhUPElkFHYQZAIUQ_AUoAHoECAEQAg&biw=1366&bih=615&dpr=1" target="_blank"><span style="color: #741b47;">Luxating Patellas</span></a> (in both legs). Further, in his right leg, he also has an "underdeveloped" Achilles Tendon. </div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;">Our poor baby! </div><div style="text-align: left;"> </div><div style="text-align: left;">For the time being, we have elected not to have surgery done for him, because he doesn't appear to be in pain, and considering how stressful just his neuter was for him, we do not want to put him through additional operations if we don't have to. Also, the long & difficult healing process from JUST ONE of the multiple surgeries he would require, is, at this time, not something we are willing to put him through. He never cries unless one of the big brothers plays too hard. He seems more frustrated than anything. </div><div style="text-align: left;">He is also on a prescription diet (both wet & dry) and that has helped his diarrhea immensely! Also, since he has been on this special diet, he seems to be getting stronger, slowly but surely. He still has a lot of work to do, but he plays more, walks stronger (if still wobbly,) and is climbing again. His confidence has been going up as well. <br /></div><div style="text-align: left;"><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgINGBLMRQDskldOq2b3miS-8iWVOk2GKphVqMYuL6mIok9tx3F7xgh05IDNidMKnWjhWLkPM-8tg3ySPXj7y9sGeP7oGlLFxXnsfg5TIhlmBhzb48fW9NLttpJCSBLxxrDoQztoyJe9NpRVgWbQ47b5AR2-wS1xcsiHp9ZQn2x-fti0AAVOY3XeIjr/s4032/20211129_110438.jpg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="4032" data-original-width="3024" height="560" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgINGBLMRQDskldOq2b3miS-8iWVOk2GKphVqMYuL6mIok9tx3F7xgh05IDNidMKnWjhWLkPM-8tg3ySPXj7y9sGeP7oGlLFxXnsfg5TIhlmBhzb48fW9NLttpJCSBLxxrDoQztoyJe9NpRVgWbQ47b5AR2-wS1xcsiHp9ZQn2x-fti0AAVOY3XeIjr/w420-h560/20211129_110438.jpg" width="420" /></a></div><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhSzq8HlwqYJAQtYQoBHh9PnfHkowAScuWQu5tz5ew68k3TarJ5rEu6hGQ4V1QhEczorUUBbK2xVFXF6XOgKwQm6LBWLo-n9GFOQ_2LTqfsfp6wzMaQhL2QO_wD8rDrURjLYCX5ij1Fb5sFb77mnhZSwOT2i955OL33MH6NDqXOCUVCtxIh1c3JJZtb/s1008/Resized_20220514_091557.jpeg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="756" data-original-width="1008" height="399" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhSzq8HlwqYJAQtYQoBHh9PnfHkowAScuWQu5tz5ew68k3TarJ5rEu6hGQ4V1QhEczorUUBbK2xVFXF6XOgKwQm6LBWLo-n9GFOQ_2LTqfsfp6wzMaQhL2QO_wD8rDrURjLYCX5ij1Fb5sFb77mnhZSwOT2i955OL33MH6NDqXOCUVCtxIh1c3JJZtb/w531-h399/Resized_20220514_091557.jpeg" width="531" /></a></div><br /><div style="text-align: left;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: left;">NAME: Neptune</div><div style="text-align: left;">NICKNAMES: Neppy, Little Butt, Baby Boy, Drama Queen</div><div style="text-align: left;">OCCUPATION: None. LOVES watching the dishwasher being loaded/unloaded though. Gets so excited every time it opens.<br />
</div>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6324292368020413992.post-66812429469150390532022-07-10T11:22:00.004-04:002022-07-10T11:22:38.279-04:00Sunday Confessions: July 10, 2012<div style="text-align: center;"><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj_PkTaEw0Kmk0I_QcMrObWGprBQ1jl7bpk654_swCHkIGAejzU68j2eh8SvR9uaBrkQ5rJ1hrPofTVSgkNSRjZBUJgEzdUcLQxd17mP6eNvjXGGusEDo8berEvVVV7tdG4l3vCnZL-EppjS-8it9yshoIoCQZYC-KWIymzzSzWYJ826NoxBVvEzd1l/s6000/sundayconfessionssummer2022(1).jpg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="4000" data-original-width="6000" height="335" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj_PkTaEw0Kmk0I_QcMrObWGprBQ1jl7bpk654_swCHkIGAejzU68j2eh8SvR9uaBrkQ5rJ1hrPofTVSgkNSRjZBUJgEzdUcLQxd17mP6eNvjXGGusEDo8berEvVVV7tdG4l3vCnZL-EppjS-8it9yshoIoCQZYC-KWIymzzSzWYJ826NoxBVvEzd1l/w503-h335/sundayconfessionssummer2022(1).jpg" width="503" /></a></div><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;"><b> </b></div><div style="text-align: left;"><b>I Confess:</b></div><div style="text-align: left;">So, the job I got is as a Pharmacy Technician (in training). I really like it! And the Pharmacists I work with are both awesome. There is so much I wish I could write about and can't right now because I'm just too tired and neurotic to unwrap it all. None of it is privacy-violating type stuff. More like "Why am I like this?" kind of stuff.</div><div style="text-align: left;"><b><br /></b></div><div style="text-align: left;"><b>I Confess:</b></div><div style="text-align: left;">Some months ago, we received a random wedding invitation from some couple down state. Shawn and I were both like "I have no idea who either of these people are?" I mean, congratulations on your marriage, random bride & groom we've never met. But who are you people?" </div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: center;"><iframe allowfullscreen="" class="giphy-embed" frameborder="0" height="260" src="https://giphy.com/embed/3otPosB88Sj6KOBP44" width="480"></iframe></div><p><br /></p><div style="text-align: left;">We googled and checked both our social media and neither of us could identify the couple.</div><div style="text-align: left;">Fast forward a handful of months and I'm visiting with my dad and he's like "Yeah, me and Carol were down state for a my niece's wedding. Your cousin. You were invited." </div><div style="text-align: center;"> </div><div style="text-align: center;">ME:</div><div style="text-align: center;"><iframe allowfullscreen="" class="giphy-embed" frameborder="0" height="400" src="https://giphy.com/embed/5t9wJjyHAOxvnxcPNk" width="400"></iframe></div><p><br /></p><p><br /></p><div style="text-align: left;">I Confess:</div><div style="text-align: left;">I've been working 50 hours a week and today is the first day in several weeks where I not only have the day off, but I have zero obligations. Yay!<br /></div>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6324292368020413992.post-70387141701932916342022-06-19T12:45:00.005-04:002022-06-19T12:45:42.849-04:00Sunday Confessions: June 19, 2022<p> </p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgUoL1OPUzAZNufKcYvhs_mvBxzpFyKy0CP8FWOgA3wXyulHKJ6zOMp7mDib98RCojVmn0JbGD7LEGr4zbOq2DU2r3c5x7zN6dY4ZwHHtxZZunGR9L6GXojkjPcMmpuAvj7k2H4JoC66Qx_YjD-zdIi5v_e8CF8pFZl_qIZH0UOZAB72xAcnlKBbe0I/s6000/sundayconfessionssummer2022(1).jpg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="4000" data-original-width="6000" height="350" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgUoL1OPUzAZNufKcYvhs_mvBxzpFyKy0CP8FWOgA3wXyulHKJ6zOMp7mDib98RCojVmn0JbGD7LEGr4zbOq2DU2r3c5x7zN6dY4ZwHHtxZZunGR9L6GXojkjPcMmpuAvj7k2H4JoC66Qx_YjD-zdIi5v_e8CF8pFZl_qIZH0UOZAB72xAcnlKBbe0I/w532-h354/sundayconfessionssummer2022(1).jpg" width="535" /></a></div><br /><p></p><p></p><p><br /></p><div style="text-align: left;"><b>I Confess:</b></div><div style="text-align: left;">I
was able to get cortisone injections in both wrists to help with the
numbness & pain of carpal tunnel until I can afford surgery. <div style="text-align: left;">The
injections themselves went well. Except, it was...different. I have
previously had C injections in my right knee (on two occasions) and both
of my thumbs (once, both at the same time). All of these occasions, there
was a tingling coolness & pain during the injection. Then the entire
area went numb. Then, after a few hours, there would be some
discomfort. The following day would be stiff & painful but gradually
decreasing until the pain was completely gone within 36 hours of the
injection. </div><div style="text-align: left;">This
time, in my wrists, the injection was not painful. There was no tingly
cooling sensation. My hands never went truly numb. My tongue did? And my
jaw felt all weird. And I felt kinda dizzy & lightheaded. But that
passed after a few hours. </div><div style="text-align: left;">My
injection was Friday morning, first thing. I was a little sore the rest
of the day. Saturday my hands were extremely sore & achy. Sunday
was worse - so bad I almost considered urgent care, but figured I could
wait. </div><div style="text-align: left;">Monday
my wrists were still very sore, and I had a call into my GP. After a
bit of phone tag discussing how I'd been treating up until that point,
they recommended diclofenac cream. I explained I cannot use that because
the smell triggers migraines. This is the response I got: <br /></div></div><div style="text-align: left;"> </div><div style="text-align: center;"></div><div style="text-align: center;"></div><div style="text-align: center;"><iframe allowfullscreen="" class="giphy-embed" frameborder="0" height="380" src="https://giphy.com/embed/HjAkFX10VqIZa" width="289"></iframe></div><p></p><p> </p><p>(Actually it was just an email that said "OK".)</p><p><br />
</p><div style="text-align: left;"><b>I Confess:</b></div><div style="text-align: left;">I got a new job. I honestly think it is THE JOB. It's GREAT! I really like it, the pay is much better than I was making, the hours are better, I have a set schedule 99% of the time, and I am eligible for medical benefits after either 30 or 90 days. (There was some confusion.) </div><div style="text-align: left;">Only. </div><div style="text-align: left;">I'm afraid I'm going to fail at it. It's A LOT of learning. A LOT - A LOT. So I am afraid I won't pick it up fast enough, or I won't perform at expected levels, and that I'll ultimately crash and burn. Husband assures me I am smart enough to do the job, but as anyone who has read this blog before knows: I struggle with crippling self-doubt and insecurity. So, fingers crossed. </div><div style="text-align: left;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: left;">That's all I have for this week. What's on your minds?<br />
</div>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6324292368020413992.post-25982285779861871152022-05-25T16:17:00.001-04:002022-05-25T16:17:25.895-04:00Goals: For my 40's<p> </p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiC4Zfjct2Bki_mwJ0NCQZeCYAC-9RU2_T-CEhoheTP26XFFRchxbPlPm1vSacEbUu8WnO57qsc11mI9aVafN7ftwBRJIWU25VJY39kmdrI6USCQLHTRtX9-1uNxVHQMHMs5O3W_VmBjKQ7QaFGE7kUKXv_08dViTI3vIec03qnfZnXuuCY_3OnjQU3Rg/s5184/goalsformyforties.png" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="3456" data-original-width="5184" height="426" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiC4Zfjct2Bki_mwJ0NCQZeCYAC-9RU2_T-CEhoheTP26XFFRchxbPlPm1vSacEbUu8WnO57qsc11mI9aVafN7ftwBRJIWU25VJY39kmdrI6USCQLHTRtX9-1uNxVHQMHMs5O3W_VmBjKQ7QaFGE7kUKXv_08dViTI3vIec03qnfZnXuuCY_3OnjQU3Rg/w640-h426/goalsformyforties.png" width="640" /></a></div><p></p><p><br /></p><div style="text-align: left;">Oh lord. There is so much I want to do. </div><div style="text-align: left;">I will try to organize these as best I can, but many of them fall into multiple sections. </div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="font-size: small;"> </span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="font-size: small;"> </span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="font-size: small;"><b><u>TRAVEL/FUNSIES-</u></b></span></div><div style="text-align: left;"> </div><div style="text-align: left;">⬥ See The Killers in concert</div><div style="text-align: left;">⬥ See Red Hot Chili Peppers in concert</div><div style="text-align: center;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;"> </div><div style="text-align: center;"></div><div style="text-align: center;"><iframe allowfullscreen="" class="giphy-embed" frameborder="0" height="280" src="https://giphy.com/embed/McZiWIoOnYrTXYhgvA" width="280"></iframe></div><p><br /></p><div style="text-align: left;">⬥ Go camping in the U.P. </div><div style="text-align: left;">⬥ Vacation in Southern California to visit my aunts & do all the touristy stuff.</div><div style="text-align: left;">⬥ Visit San Jose area</div><div style="text-align: left;">⬥ Go on a girl's trip with some blogger friends. I don't really care where to. </div><div style="text-align: left;">⬥ Have an old-fashioned road trip out west with the husband. </div><div style="text-align: left;">⬥ See Jim Gaffigan live again.</div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;"><u><b><br /></b></u></div><div style="text-align: left;"><u><b>BODY STUFF-</b></u></div><div style="text-align: left;"> </div><div style="text-align: left;">⬥ Get my carpal tunnel syndrome repaired.</div><div style="text-align: left;"><div style="text-align: left;">⬥ Get the pinched nerves in my elbows repaired.</div><div style="text-align: left;"> </div><div style="text-align: center;"><iframe allowfullscreen="" class="giphy-embed" frameborder="0" height="264" src="https://giphy.com/embed/7T33BLlB7NQrjozoRB" width="480"></iframe></div><p><a href="https://giphy.com/gifs/hidethepainharold-pain-hide-7T33BLlB7NQrjozoRB"></a></p></div><div style="text-align: left;"> </div><div style="text-align: left;"> </div><div style="text-align: left;">⬥ Get my posture repaired/fixed/improved.</div><div style="text-align: left;">⬥ Get my tattoo work done. (It's not looking like this will be the year.)</div><div style="text-align: left;">⬥ Jog a mile. Okay, this is a bit less important for me. It's a sort-of guideline for the work to improve my pulmonary & cardiovascular health. </div><div style="text-align: left;">⬥ Figure out the answer to my thinning hair & resolve. Even if requires transplant surgery down the road.</div><div style="text-align: left;">⬥ Get a breast reduction. This one is iffy and definitely a few years out. Because I am actively working to lose weight, it's important to get to a stable, healthy weight and maintain it for a period of time before assessing whether reduction is still a good option.</div><div style="text-align: left;"> </div><div style="text-align: left;"><div style="text-align: center;"><iframe allowfullscreen="" class="giphy-embed" frameborder="0" height="300" src="https://giphy.com/embed/demgpwJ6rs2DS" width="400"></iframe></div><p><br /></p> </div><div style="text-align: left;">⬥ Lower my size to somewhere like 10/12 ish. I don't have a specific goal weight in mind, although the numbers are there in my head sort of loosey-goosey, I also know that realistically, I do not have the frame to be a size 6. But back when I was size 10/12 ish, I felt pretty decent for the most part. I care more about being healthy and feeling good than about specific numbers. </div><div style="text-align: left;">⬥ Get a hearing aid. If you want to be absolutely technical, I could get one for each ear. But I'd be down with at least just getting one for my right ear. <br /></div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;"><u><b>MISC.-</b></u></div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;">⬥ Learn to swim. I'd like to find and take an adult introductory swimming class. </div><div style="text-align: left;">⬥ Learn Spanish. I don't expect to be fluent, but I'd like to have more conversational skills. </div><div style="text-align: left;">⬥ Build a nest egg. For many reasons, some our own fault and some beyond our control, (my health playing a major factor), the husband and I continue to live hand-to-mouth. And I'm so over it. </div><div style="text-align: left;">⬥ Get THE JOB. If you read my <span style="background-color: #fcff01;">Spring/Summer 2022 Goals</span> post, you'll know what job I'm talking about. As I write this, I am hoping for it to come to fruition in - yes - Spring/Summer 2022, but there's no guarantee and it is a BIG GOAL. </div><div style="text-align: left;"> </div><div style="text-align: left;">I'm sure I'm missing a bunch, but that's what I've got for now.<br /></div><div style="text-align: left;"> </div><div style="text-align: left;"> </div><div style="text-align: center;"><iframe allowfullscreen="" class="giphy-embed" frameborder="0" height="270" src="https://giphy.com/embed/3o6Ztl5XZaXwjl6WEE" width="480"></iframe></div><p><br /></p>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6324292368020413992.post-36216577145305163572022-05-01T02:26:00.001-04:002022-05-01T02:26:00.183-04:00Sunday Confessions: May 1, 2022<p> </p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjpl_5evlxYEOf341RFRTQAoijUPfwp-DDd39-a8TFvayk4wc4pyLyw54PRUZqT0FgXIpe_BlqAMg12eMFKp98oa6TMAiyAXwu2ookcVvttdtbcRRn1ndVljofqGIxqMGQ0mcByFsobtsw5o49O2jALr8xdkOPC6xjfmE-CR4beZfMs1bPID7Rrl64i/s4096/foodie-factor-334983.jpg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="2730" data-original-width="4096" height="393" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjpl_5evlxYEOf341RFRTQAoijUPfwp-DDd39-a8TFvayk4wc4pyLyw54PRUZqT0FgXIpe_BlqAMg12eMFKp98oa6TMAiyAXwu2ookcVvttdtbcRRn1ndVljofqGIxqMGQ0mcByFsobtsw5o49O2jALr8xdkOPC6xjfmE-CR4beZfMs1bPID7Rrl64i/w590-h393/foodie-factor-334983.jpg" width="590" /></a></div><p></p><p><br /></p><div style="text-align: left;"><b>I Confess:</b> </div><div style="text-align: left;">I went to the dentist on Wednesday & got a couple cavities filled (but one in particular) - and I got a clean bill of healthy gums, no new cavities or issues, and healthy roots. Which made me very happy because I was having anxiety dreams about my teeth cracking open and splitting up through my skull and breaking my skull in half. So I'm glad it's all fixed and there's nothing new.</div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;"><b><br /></b></div><div style="text-align: left;"><b>I Confess:</b></div><div style="text-align: left;">There is a broken stop light at a busy intersection. It's blinking red on all sides and is just a total disaster waiting to happen. It's been like that for a week already and the word is that it will probably be like that for a couple more due to waiting for parts & also someone who can do the repair work. Thank goodness I don't have to go to that side of town much. There is also a ton of construction near this light and like, three different detours to go around and it's all very convoluted and ridiculous. I only know this because my dentist is on that side of town. So it made the trip there and back quite interesting.</div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;"><b>I Confess:</b></div><div style="text-align: left;">I was really sick for a while. It started off as like a cold, then turned into Covid! When the 'Rona calmed down and I tested negative, I was left with a nasty case of bronchitis. I ended up missing 2 weeks of work which I was/am quite upset about, and left with intense monetary anxiety, since Husband was ALSO sick - symptom for symptom, he was about 36 hours behind me. So he missed some work, too. Which never happens. So, fuck. I am picking up all the hours I can, but the anxiety remains.</div><div style="text-align: left;"> </div><div style="text-align: left;"> </div><div style="text-align: left;"><div style="text-align: center;"><iframe allowfullscreen="" class="giphy-embed" frameborder="0" height="400" src="https://giphy.com/embed/xUOrwihszfWZgSIHJK" width="400"></iframe></div><p><br /></p></div><div style="text-align: left;"> </div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;"><b>I Confess:</b></div><div style="text-align: left;">There was a bill put forth and qualified Michiganders are getting a car insurance refund thing. To help with the "devastating costs of car insurance in Michigan." Apparently, Michigan has some of the highest rates in the nation. I guess? I'd always heard Rhode Island was the highest, and California is notorious for it. But apparently we're up there, too. Anyway, we haven't received our rebate/refund check yet and that is also causing me a great deal of anxiety. Because it's like...dude. Now.</div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;"><b>I Confess:</b></div><div style="text-align: left;">I feel like this SC post is a lot more involved than my usual. There's a lot to unpack here, I feel like. </div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6324292368020413992.post-91045448704351705672022-04-25T17:46:00.123-04:002022-05-11T09:55:52.881-04:00Spring/Summer Goals 2022<p style="text-align: center;"> </p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg7Ra8ix0DtHH0pz1hL1AMpjcOKCf0sWDEzK2RYDuudQLF0rhlL3yi_2RsWylaTvhpztfb9feCy2iimovMZiEFtI76TGuGv9FTtp5J_4jt4EarRy4gaxOVOt7e3spOeRLdwZtpTu15c8OnSMtXxx_6IMLTSJ0wBMwr3j1iUJp98ZcyZLkXq488G0X7i/s6286/lukas-blazek-GnvurwJsKaY-unsplash.png" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="4211" data-original-width="6286" height="405" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg7Ra8ix0DtHH0pz1hL1AMpjcOKCf0sWDEzK2RYDuudQLF0rhlL3yi_2RsWylaTvhpztfb9feCy2iimovMZiEFtI76TGuGv9FTtp5J_4jt4EarRy4gaxOVOt7e3spOeRLdwZtpTu15c8OnSMtXxx_6IMLTSJ0wBMwr3j1iUJp98ZcyZLkXq488G0X7i/w604-h405/lukas-blazek-GnvurwJsKaY-unsplash.png" width="604" /></a></div><p></p><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;">Since spring is in some ways a non-entity in Michigan where winter bleeds into "spring" which bleeds into summer until about the July mark, I decided to combine the two.<br /></div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div>
<div style="text-align: center;"></div><div style="text-align: center;"></div><div style="text-align: center;"><iframe allow="accelerometer; autoplay; clipboard-write; encrypted-media; gyroscope; picture-in-picture" allowfullscreen="" frameborder="0" height="315" src="https://www.youtube.com/embed/bjrI64S9DTw?start=305&end=337" title="YouTube video player" width="560"></iframe></div><p><u><br /></u></p><div style="text-align: left;"><u>1.) Get a Good Full-Time Job With Medical Benefits:</u></div><div style="text-align: left;">This may take a while. I don't want just any job; I want (need) something I can be happy with long term. I like my current job at Old Navy, and the people are awesome, but I'm not full time and I don't know what the insurance is like if I ever do make it. Additionally, the pay isn't that great. Not terrible, but could be better. I'd be happy if they made me full time and even happier if they gave me a raise - even $0.50/hour would be great.<br /></div><div style="text-align: left;">I have been on the hunt (again, not for just any job, but you know...THE JOB) and I have applied for a few jobs I am wildly under-qualified for, which I sort of found entertaining.</div><div style="text-align: left;"> </div><div style="text-align: center;"> <img alt="" class="hCL kVc L4E MIw" src="https://i.pinimg.com/originals/cd/50/07/cd500735a5daeedee4994239d43ebe2a.gif" /></div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;"><u><br /></u></div><div style="text-align: left;"><u>2.) Clean All the Windows Inside & Out:</u></div><div style="text-align: left;">It's just such a<i> task</i>, I don't do it often and obviously never in the winter. </div><div style="text-align: left;"><u><br /></u></div><div style="text-align: left;"><u><br /></u></div><div style="text-align: left;"><u>3.) Take Advantage of the Weather & Walk Outside More:</u></div><div style="text-align: left;">Guys. Let's be real. I am a lazy fuck. But fresh air and exercise (even mild) is supposed to be good for you. So I'll give it a whirl. </div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;"><u>4.) Get Neptune Desexed:</u></div><div style="text-align: left;">For realsies, now that he's old enough.</div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;"><u>5.) Get Bankruptcy Finalized:</u></div><div style="text-align: left;">For reals. It's been a bit of a production scene, but we're closing in on the end. </div><div style="text-align: left;"> </div><div style="text-align: left;"> </div><div style="text-align: left;"><u>6.) Spend More Time With Family & Friends:</u></div><div style="text-align: left;">A bit of a challenge when everyone works and people also want down time. But it's easier to get places when the weather is nice - not just the physical logistics but also 6pm in winter is like...dead of night I should be in bed - but in summer it's like late afternoon. So. Yeah. The vibe. <br /></div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;"><u>7.) Read More:</u></div><div style="text-align: left;">One of my winter goals was to write more and I failed that epically. Between my carpal tunnel and pinched nerves, and melty brain, writing has been a challenge. But I'm feeling like I definitely want to read more. <br /></div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: left;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: center;"><br /></div><div style="text-align: center;"><iframe allowfullscreen="" class="giphy-embed" frameborder="0" height="400" src="https://giphy.com/embed/tYpzCh5MkECzAbTz6l" width="400"></iframe></div><p><br /></p><p><br /></p><p>What are your goals?<br /></p><p><br /></p><br /><br />Unknownnoreply@blogger.com3