Sunday, April 23

Sunday Confessions - April 23, 2017

I Confess: I have been deep in a depression fugue. I am trying to find my way out; it is not going well.

Sunday, April 9

Sunday Confessions April 9, 2017

I Confes: Watching Forensic Files makes me feel smart. :) 

I Confess: Still no job, but still looking.

I Confess: I've been reading young adult books (not even thought-provoking or challenging ones) in the bathtub and before bed. They are super easy, super quick, require almost zero brain power, I can get in and get (of the book) without being any transition time or re-reading of pages or "oh yeah, that's what was happening" and they are fun. (Example: the book version of I Know What You Did Last Summer.)

Thursday, April 6

Film Friday: Resident Evil: Extinction


RE: Extinction starts (5) years after the events of Apocalypse.  We are again gifted with the Alice Narration Intro which recaps the events of the previous 2 films. During this introduction, we learn that (apparently) the T-Virus hasn't just destroyed mankind; the entire earth itself has been turned into a desert wasteland - rivers & lakes have dried up, forests have withered and died. The world is not a vampire, the world is a desert. 

{My first question is... why? I would get it if the film took place in a location that normally would have lots of forest or water but they needed to film in the desert for cost and decided to jam that in for explanation. 
But the movie takes place in the desert. Like, the setting IS IN THE DESERT. You don't have to try to explain the sand, Paul W.S. Anderson. We get why there is sand.}

But ok. Whatever. Moving on. We know Alice still has her psionic powers because the movie says so. We are again given a brief intro of all our non-Alice main characters, supporting characters, and obvious dead meat on legs. 
Back for round 2 is Carlos and LJ from the previous film. Yay! 
And...our main supporting protagonist - ladies and gentleman, it's Claire Redfield! Yay! And who will be our Claire Redfield? 
She's fought evil houses, death itself, and even had her own fitness empire. . . .Ali Larter who is now running a convoy for survivors of the zombie apocalypse. 

Alice eventually hooks up with the convoy and Carlos is all expostionally "Hey, why'd you split years ago?" and she gives him the "It's not you, it's me; I'm being tracked by an evil corporation," speech.
Aww, pointless love story. 

Dr. Isaacs (minor villain from Apocalypse), has taken over and is lead villain in Extinction. He has created hundreds of clones of Project Alice and, under the "supervision" of Albert Wesker (via hologram) ostensibly been using these clones to figure out how Alice's blood bonded with the T-Virus so he can create a "sort-of cure" and domesticate the existing zombies. It doesn't go well: 

LOL, Dr. Isaacs, you so crazy. 

The failed experiment does give him a new idea though - if we make super zombies and unleash a bunch of them on Super Psionic Alice and bring her in so we can experiment on Original Alice blood. (The xerox Alice's just aren't cutting the mustard, lol.)

And while the convoy and Alice battle the super zombies, this happens. (Dammit, LJ, don't you remember anything? - Sigh. Every zombie film has that one asshole who is a bite-hider. Although I do think that AFTER FIVE YEARS, the people in the convoy should have recognized the signs of infection before he was able to turn. But whatever. Logic is applying less and less.)

So the movie is essentially them moving throughout the desert as a group, fighting zombies and birds along the way, losing people, and deciding they must have a goal, and that goal is going to be Arcadia, a small town in Alaska that is by all accounts, isolated and infection-free. Score!
So, after sending Claire and company off on a helicopter to the haven Arcadia, Alice breaks into another one of Umbrella's secret underground facilities to get a bit of revenge on Dr. Isaacs and anyone else she might be mad at.

Inside the secret facility, Alice meets the White Queen who is, essentially the "good" version of little girl AI. Le sigh. And the White Queen is like "yeah, you can totally cure the T-Virus now that you're here, except. . . one small problem."

Small problem.

Yeah, "small problem" being Dr. Isaacs has gone full mad scientist and has turned himself into a Tyrant.
Boss battle ensues and of course, Alice is eventually victorious, after telling off the good doctor when he makes a whole "I am the future of the world, I am indestructible," speech and she's like "Nope, actually, you're just another asshole."
Right on, sister.
But Alice isn't alone. She is saved by one of her clones, and they announce that they (and all the Alice clones) are coming for Albert Wesker and all the Umbrella cronies.

And that's where we end this installment. While the original was silly and an actual analysis of it would reveal SO MUCH WRONG, it is at least straightforward and coherent.
Number 2, Apocalypse, is ridiculous but at least kinda fun, and while there are 8 million continuity errors and plot holes, it's an enjoyable enough popcorn/background movie.
Extinction finishes off the primary plot that has been driving the first few movies and moves on to start following a new main plot line - the Albert Wesker is evil line. It takes itself too seriously, but not seriously enough to be unintentionally funny.
There are some enjoyable bits and pieces, but they are few and far between. If choosing to watch this movie, it's definitely funnier if you've been imbibing (something, anything), and have your "this shit is funny" hat on.

Ties to the game: Claire Redfield is one of the two playable characters in the Resident Evil 2 game. Tyrant (in various forms) is a common boss creature faced in the games.  I am honestly not sure beyond that. If there are others, they are fairly subtle.


Heads Up:  Violence, blood, gore, language, monsters.

Sunday, April 2

Sunday Confessions: April 2, 2017

I Confess: I am frustrated and grumpy and everything sucks. I had to leave my job as prep cook because my shoulder injury became "literally can't lift my arm" and I haven't been able to find anything new yet, despite applying at several places. Fuck fuck fuck. I feel like every time things start to improve a little, they fall back a lot.

I Confess: I am at that point in my menstrual cycle (3, 4 days until start) when it's like "Give me all the food!" (Also: it is not lost on me that PMS contributes majorly to my attitude and emotions. I mean, life does suck, but PMS is like making it all bold, italic, and highlighted.)