5 Things That Keep Me From Blogging

5 Things That Keep Me From Blogging

 

This is 1000% NOT how I wanted to introduce this series, which was 100% inspired by Heather's List Series.

1.) Depression

This is the most major, and longest running reason. I have a few posts started about the whole thing, but the short-short version is I was in a dark grey downward spiral. It lasted for a long time. (Apparently it was a thing this winter. But suffice to say, when you cannot force yourself to get out of bed, and spend three hours convincing yourself to check the mail, you're not going to be interneting much.

 

2.) Too Much "Fucking Around"

By this I mean that I often get caught up in certain details that are the frosting of the post cake. If I can't find a header I like, I'll have to create one, and then that's a black hole of stock images and fonts and...you get the idea. Case in point: I wanted to use a particular gif for this post, but I could only find one version of it and I didn't like it. I considered a meme version of it, but the quality wasn't what I wanted. Ultimately, to get the exact gif I want, I will have to create it, which will again turn into a black hole. I forced myself to just move on. (For now.)

 

3.) Actual Life

Work, dealing with medical stuff, attempting some measure of upkeep on the apartment, fighting the never-ending battle of cat hair, and whenever possible, spending time with Shawn. 

 

4.) Total Lazyness

Yeah, no excuse. I can't count the number of times I was like "I'm going to blog after dinner," and then ...nope. Or "I'm going to work on my blog and catch up on reading today. And then find myself getting sucked into watching shitty movies.

 

5.) Insecurity (This is tied in with #2)

I always wonder if my posts are interesting enough. I suppose they are interesting enough for my loyal readers, whom I love and adore, and at the core, the blog should be for ME. But I often find that hard to remember. I often worry if I'm too wordy. Or if my posts won't be interesting enough if I don't have enough pictures. 

 

 

 

 

(This is not why I add gifs to everything; I just really like them.)

I think the TL;DR, pics-or-it-didn't-happen, zero attention span culture gets to me sometimes. Even though that's not how I roll and therefore not even my audience, it doesn't stop me from feeling self- conscious about it, and wondering if I should search for pictures, or create more pictures. 

But not just that. When I actively DO want to put a picture up, I often fret over background and lighting. Not like I'm such a pro. But. 

Example:

I am working on another post of 5 Things That Improved My Quality of Life. 

A few of the items on the list I have taken pics of, for a more personal feel. But then I get caught up in how I should pose the item; should I use something as a background or just lay it on my desk with no worries? And then I obsess over getting a clean, clear shot, with as little shadow as possible. I once took over 20 pictures of an anti-chafing stick. Ultimately, I still wasn't happy with the result, because it felt "amateur" and like something a grade schooler would present, and I sometimes feel like a dunce. 

So I guess you could boil it all down to overthinking and being a bit neurotic. And lazy. But I'm getting better. 

*Image Source