Sunday, June 22

A Letter to My Nephew

 My nephew graduated from high school recently and today was his open house. This is a copy of the letter I included in his card.

Jeffrey -

When I first met you, you were just this little thing they handed to me, all wrapped up in blankets to keep you warm. The first thing I said was "Where is he?" And Laurie and my mom said "Look inside." And I peeked closer and saw your tiny sleeping face.
You weighed just 3 pounds and 3 ounces. If you pick that up in a dumb bell, it doesn't seem so bad. But when you spread that out over a 20" long human - it felt like nothing. I was afraid I was going to break you just by holding you for a few minutes.

After a few weeks, you finally reached 5 pounds and were able to come home.

And over the months, you grew, and the family watched, in awe.

Before you could speak, you demonstrated an understanding of language and colors and shapes, as I would say "put the green triangle on top of the circle" with your building blocks and you did it perfectly, no matter what combination I gave you. You just blew me away.

Sometimes I would babysit you and you were delightful with your curiosity, pointing at things and asking "What's this?" I think "What's this" was like, your fifth word or something. :)
Sometimes when I was babysitting and doing my homework, I would read you to sleep by reading my school textbooks to you. It didn't take long before you were like "Not that book, Aunt Becky." :) More than once you asked me to read the dictionary to you. So I did, and what's best really listened.

Watching you grow up over the years, form your own opinions and ideas, your own likes and dislikes, watching you evolve....has been a pleasure and has been a truer measure of time than I think you'll understand until you have a child in your life that you watch grow. I know it's cliche, but really, it's true. It's really not until there is a child you watch grow into an adult that you have a true understanding of the passage of time.

Now you're a young man out of high school and starting a new chapter, or if life is a multi-series book, then you're in the next book of the series. :)
Now instead of me reading the dictionary to you and showing you all the cool pictures in the National Geographic of all the different types of people and animals in the world, now you're teaching me things about the internet and bravery.

I could not be prouder of you, Jeffrey.

As you go forth in life and continue to grow, I look forward to watching where you go from here and hopefully sharing some of my life experiences and also learning more from you. 

Tuesday, June 17

Workplace Safety Isn't Funny - It's Hilarious

So you know how I work at a thrift store, right? Well, it's pretty high volume, and we have several locations, and the location I work at happens to be the central flagship store for our district. 

There happened a time when a delivery truck driver randomly showed up at like, 8 o'clock at night and no one was there who was certified on the hi-lo or the walker-stacker. So we sent him away with instructions to come back tomorrow. 
So they decided that damn near everybody and their mother has to be certified to do at least one or the other.  
Which is where this post comes in. 
I did the first part of my training yesterday, which was to watch the 3-part training video on industrial trucks and equipment.  This is part one, which is meant to get your attention and make you pay attention to part two, which is longer, still has a lot of accidents, but is much less graphic. In fact, the part two video even says "non-graphic" version.  
But part one? It's like the best B-horror movie ever. I'm so glad I found it on youtube! Enjoy! 

(I think the guy with the nail in his eye around 1:02 is my favorite.) 

Wednesday, June 11

All the Work Gifs

When I constantly have to ride someone's ass to get them to do their job, I feel like:

How I feel when I haven't even punched in and it's an obvious shit-storm:
bored animated GIF

How I feel when I give someone instruction and they respond with "just a minute."

How I feel when I've made a mistake at work:
teenage mutant ninja turtles animated GIF

When the BIG bosses come out for a look-see, I:
the simpsons animated GIF

How I feel when we've had a busy day, the store is trashed, and everyone is all
"are we going to get out early tonight?"

How I feel when people keep nagging me about leaving when I'm not done with my work yet.

How it feels when we DO get out early:

How it feels on days when everything runs smoothly:

How I feel when the entire day has been a cluster fuck.

How I feel when my team has been working hard, regardless of the type of day it is: